agenda

– call Ombuds office and have extremely long, very confusing conversation regarding my plagiarism policy

– google stuff about plagiarism

– open a blank Word doc titled “FIRST CLASS LECTURE” for literally maybe the 100th time and stare at it for 15 minutes

– suddenly realize that I am making a list of books to read in preparation for a new book chapter, perhaps the least important thing on my entire to-do list right now

– open up a blank Word document titled “NEW BOOK CHAPTER” and stare at it for awhile

– decide to write chapter outline of new chapter without having done any research on it yet

– make new Word doc titled “NEW CHAPTER OUTLINE” and stare at it for awhile

– go back to my plagiarism policy

– google “British burned down the white house 1814?”

– get email from bookstore saying they are unable to get one of my textbooks

– call bookstore. They say that book is “coming.” No resolution

– find out my spotify playlist, which I need to be able to give to a bunch of students in one week, doesn’t work on a bunch of computers

– worry about my dog getting Lyme disease

– make yet another note-to-self about getting Colson Whitehead’s zombie novel

– read wiki on Colson Whitehead. Get annoyed at them calling him “African American author Colson Whitehead.”

– make note-to-self to get “Erasure,” Percival Everett’s scathing critique of racism in America, in which his protagonist, a scholar of Ancient Greece, keeps finding his academic texts on Plato and the Parthenon filed under “African American Literature”

– download Evernote and transfer everything from Scrivener to Evernote

– realize that almost my entire list of books headed “read these SOON!” are books I actually already not only read but took extensive reading notes on

– google “can I succeed in life if I can’t do anything”

– back to that plagiarism policy

– realize I should make a cake but I don’t have any of the ingredients except flour

– google “cake made only of flour”

– roll out yoga mat in preparation for cleansing home practice

– sit on yoga mat for 30 minutes listening to Comedy Bang Bang

– 8 large wines

– lie in bed staring at ceiling thinking about failure