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Coffee Shops in Portland

edited February 2012
I've been thinking about coffee shops in Portland and developing a theory.

Tier One: Serve the best coffee and make you excited
  • Coava (SE)
  • Heart (NE, SW)
  • Courier (SW)
  • Stumptown (SE, SW)
  • Ristretto (NE, N)
  • Freshpot (SE, N, SW)
  • Barista (NW, NE)
  • Extracto
  • Red E (N)
  • Coffeehouse NW (NW)
  • Woodlawn (NE)
  • Arbor Lodge
  • Water Ave Coffee Roasters
Tier Two: Serve good coffee and you are happy enough to go:
  • Tiny's
  • Floyd's
  • Random Order
  • Coffeehouse 5
  • Seven Virtues
  • Blackwood
  • Bipartisan Cafe
Tier Three: Not exactly coffee shops, but at least it's Stumptown!
  • Kettlemen's
  • New Seasons
  • Grand Central Baking
  • Umpqua Bank
Tier Four: Not that great.
  • Palio
  • Pied Cow
  • Red & Black Cafe
  • Anna Banana's
  • K&F
  • Spunky Monkey
  • Public Domain
  • New Deal Cafe
  • World Cup
  • Caffe D'arte (the worst!)
The Chains:
  1. Peet's
  2. Starbucks
  3. Dunkin' Donuts
  4. Dutch Brothers
Diner Coffee:
  1. Denny's
  2. AM/PM
Can you help me fill in the places I am missing, and help me sort them into these rough categories? Obviously it's subjective, but I think there will be general consensus. Also, I'm curious where you drink your coffee.
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Comments

  • edited January 2012
    Sometimes, bad coffee has its place, especially when it's thin, burnt, and bottomless. Like diner coffee. Sometimes I don't want intense PDX gourmet caffeine syrup. I just want something that tastes sort of like coffee, is hot, and I can drink a few cups without suffering from cardiac arrest. AM/PM, Denny's, free coffee at the bank, Folger's in your cup... it has a nostalgia factor.
  • I think there is a tier below the chains like the gross restaurant near me that serves really weak coffee.
  • Oh, I'm talking about the same thing as LT.
  • edited January 2012
    Other Tier Ones: Barista, Extracto, Red E, Coffeehouse NW
  • edited January 2012
    Coffeehouse 5: Tier Two?
  • edited January 2012
    "Spunky Monkey" (ewwww): Tier Three? Has anybody even been in here?
  • edited January 2012
    Public Domain: Tier Three? Tier Four?
  • God, the coffee is so terrible out east. There are like only 3 places in the whole city that are serviceable. Donuts are a problem too. DC wins on the ethiopian food though.
  • What about ROCK*STAR coffee?
  • @Loose_Thread How do you rank the lower end? Is McDonald's better than Village Inn? Do you have favorites in that category?
  • edited January 2012
    Tier Two: Seven Virtues, Blackwood
  • edited January 2012
    Tier Three: New Deal Cafe
  • edited January 2012
    I think Bipartisan is T2?
  • edited January 2012
    It's cool that the longest list is Tier One.

    (i'm gonna strike comments after I add those to the main list, just as a way to keep track)
  • edited January 2012
    McDonald's has brand recognition, ubiquity, and maybe even a 6****-slap to the face of the earth in the form of styrofoam cups. Maybe McBunk should always be dead last on principle. Cuz dead last is its own sort of victory.

    Ways to measure bad coffee
    -How long ago was it made, and has evaporation taken place
    -What is the coffee source to begin with
    -Can you see like 1/4" of the way down into the cup before the liquid turns to coffee
    -Are there free "caffeine shots" near the creamer

    My favorites in order
    Folgers (the most space-age), any diner, AM/PM, McD
  • I love a mini-mart coffee machine that makes "vanilla latte" and "cappucino".
    So gross! (-ly good)
  • edited January 2012
    Another chain:
    Caffe D'arte (the worst!)

    I think Grand Central Baking might belong to Tier 4?
    New Seasons serves Stumptown, does that put it in Tier 4?
    What about that cafe at Powell's, "World Cafe"? Tier 3, I think.
    Palio in Ladd's Addition: Tier 3
    Pied Cow: Tier 3?
    "Rimsky's": eww.

    To which Tier does the commie Red & Black Cafe belong?
  • edited January 2012
    Should price and/or conviviality be a factor in the rankings?

    Barista seems crazy-priced and cold (socially) to me.

    Red E is my neighborhood jam (when I'm borrowing PDX for my neighborhood). Good fit for me there. Likewise, Freshpot.

    I've tried to like Extracto but there's something uptighty in the air that makes me want to get out quick.

    Stumptown. They are a chain. They have the vibe, they know what they are doing, but they are a chain. Right?
  • edited January 2012
    Umpqua Bank Coffee? Tier 4? (Free!)
  • I think this is *generally* a list based on quality of coffee.
    Stumptown is indeed a chain, but the quality continues to be very high.
    I hear you on the Barista vibe, though.
  • I hate to open the "What is a sandwich" can of worms but I don't think Stumptown is a chain. There is an implied sense of epic distribution that is inherent to a "chain" to me.

    Wikipedia (had to use the cache cause Wikipedia is closed today) says "Chain stores are retail outlets that share a brand and central management, and usually have standardized business methods and practices."

    But then any two stores would be a chain...

    "Some small towns in the United States exclude chain stores. They don't exclude the chain itself, only the standardized formula the chain uses, for example, there could be a restaurant owned by McDonald's which sells hamburgers, but not the formula franchise operation with the golden arches and standardized menu, uniforms, and procedures."

    That seems like a better definition I guess. Does Stumptown have a formula franchise operation? I don't think they do.
  • more important than defining chain is defining coffee shop. some of the businesses on your list are restaurants and cafes. it seems that in order to qualify as a coffee shop, then coffee has to be the main attraction of the establishment- not donuts, breakfast, bagels, or desserts.

  • and then once we establish what -is- a coffee shop, do we only judge it on the quality of their coffee? i'd argue that the delicious pies at Random Order more than make up for any deficiency in their coffee and firmly places them in the top tier category.
  • and there should probably be another tier that qualifies coffee shops that serve excellent coffee but otherwise have some fatal flaw. because there are a lot of coffee shops that serve Stumptown that are not in your top tiers.
  • it just turned into a flowchart
  • edited January 2012
    Addendum to The Chains - what about Dutch Brothers? One time I got a mocha there, and it was the foulest, but seems like DB is "a thing" around here (is it a west coast chain?) where people have weird loyalty to their DB, expressed through decals on their vehicles...
    Would it be above or below DD? Could someone please explain the DB brand/appeal/mythos?
  • This is about coffee. If we start thinking about pie we're going to get really off track. A delicious track, but still...

    I don't tend to hang out in coffee shops. I tend to get my coffee to go which is likely why I care less about the vibe. I mean, I care... but I'll go to a place with a crap vibe and bad attitudes if they serve an amazing coffee.

    So I'm cool with including a restaurant if they serve coffee in a to go cup, or will fill up my cup that I bring in.
  • coffee fountain
  • Dutch Bros is an Oregon chain, maybe started in Salem? I think the appeal is that it is anti Portland/hipster coffee.

    Mike, if it is just about coffee than how can you have coffee shops that serve the same brand of coffee in different tiers?

    Palios Stumptown or Bipartisans Stumptown pretty much tastes the same as Freshpots Stumptown. By your standards New Seasons is a tier one coffee shop, and that's just crazy. Kind of like calling a hot dog a sandwich!
  • I think any place with an actual espresso machine counts for this.

    BlackRock goes in The Chains.
  • edited January 2012
    Stumptown is aggressively pushing their brand into numerous markets around the nation. They are all called Stumptown. They purchase, roast and merchandise their coffee the Stumptown way. Chain.

    Also, thanks to those that mentioned Dutch Bros. I was thinking that too.
  • No way, bigmac, just because they get the same beans doesn't mean the quality of their brew is in the same tier.
  • I agree that all Stumptown servers are not the same, but it's worth noting that Stumptown does have minimum standards. They maintain a baseline of quality at all the stores that serve their beans. Baristas have to go through Stumptown training, Stumptown representatives have to inspect your equipment before you can serve their coffee, etc.

    Stumptown is definitely headed toward becoming a chain, if it isn't one already. It may not be a franchise, but that doesn't mean it's not a chain. Right now its a local/regional chain, and that's only if you ignore their NYC store.
  • A list like this is potentially really great for visitors or people just moving. If you find yourself in NYC, so far I've learned

    Tier 1
    Cafe Grumpy

    Tier 2
    Joe the Art of Coffee
  • I really feel strongly about how the quality of the beans/roasting process (i.e. "Stumptown") is only one factor, and that another equally major factor is how they make the actual coffee.

    You go to places that technically have Stumptown coffee but then it's just in one of those huge 7-11 vats with the pump and it tastes like dogshit. Red-e! I can't drink that shit. Arbor Lodge! You have to pay more for a pour-over. Why? BECAUSE THEY KNOW THE PUMP TASTES LIKE GARBAGE.

    How do we factor this in.

    Also where is Arbor Lodge on your list Mikey? I traditionally have not enjoyed the coffee I have drunk there but it may be a taste thing (I'm a sort of middle-of-the-road french roast type of lady, these insane new-school gourmet coffees that taste like rubbing alcohol and tomatoes are not really my scene)

    Matthew what about blue bottle?!?!?!?!?
  • I don't like blue bottle. Too darkly roasted.
  • aren't there other swanky pdx-style coffee shops in the big apple?
    I feel like I went to some when I was there but now I can only remember blue bottle...
  • Oslo? Isn't that a fancy coffee shop in Brooklyn...I think I had a decent coffee there.
  • OK- i stand corrected on the 'preparation of the coffee' factor, though doesn't judging that seem extremely complex? you might get lucky one day and walk into joe-schmoe's coffee shop and get a perfect cup that was just brewed 14 seconds earlier, or walk into Stumptown and get the bottom dregs of an air pump, leaving you with thick coffee mud that leaves coffee grounds in your teeth (this has happened to me so many times at Stumptown I am almost hesitant to place them as top tier)

    I might even interject further and say that i prefer how Freshpot prepares Stumptown Coffee then how Stumptown prepares Stumptown Coffee. Stumptown grinds their beans too fine for French Press brewing (IMHO) which results in too many coffee bean particles floating in the brew. which hurt my tummy.

  • This is a very subjective undertaking.

    This is a very subjective undertaking.

    While I am usually one pushing for DEFINING THE CRITERIA I feel like this is not the best method for determining coffee. It's true that you can get a mediocre cup at a Tier One coffee shop. And I do think the joy of seeing the words "Stumptown" has been lowered by other places that I am more excited about.
  • The interesting thing about collecting this information is what we can then do with it.

    For example, I'm not even going to add Rimsky's to the list because it's so close to Floyd's that you'd never need to go. Once we map these out we will know where the best option for coffee is in any place in Portland.
  • @YoursTruly

    Most Tier 1 places make the coffee that is in the pump vats via french press. I love that style of prep and generally prefer it to a espresso drink.

    I used to be mad at this supposed Tier 1 coffee shop Cartola because they made their pump vat coffee from an old school diner-y drip machine and i like that coffee much less.

    So, I think prep certainly has already been factored into @KmikeyM's tier based evaluation. I think Tier 1 places generally prepare their regular coffee served in the pump machines via french press.

    Pour overs cost more every place because of the labor involved. It takes a barista 3 minutes or so dedicated to that one cup and away from other sales. If they sell you a regular coffee that took one barista like 5 minutes to make like 20 cups. Labor is a serious cost.
  • Tier Three for those out east (way southeast): Lents Commons

    Unfortunately, there are no Tier 1 or 2 shops that far out. That makes this spot even more important for the poor souls out there hunting for good coffee.
  • Maybe those of us who are or have ever been drama nerds appreciate Rimsky :-B
  • edited January 2012
    Am I the only one who thinks, despite whatever, Starbucks is almost always a decent cup of Joe?

    My hunch is that a blindfold test would place it very highly on your Tier 3 list, thereby undermining (or um... DEMOLISHING) your criteria for that list.
  • Good coffee in NYC: Irving Farm
  • 1 or 2, but I think a strong contender for 1.
  • I am a coffee lover, but a reluctant coffee snob. I don't know what beans I like best. I'm still learning about washed vs. unwashed. I almost always drink the coffee in front of me, even the Paul Newman's pod things my Dad has at his house. I did throw away an americano once. It was so bad I made Alex taste it.

    Whilst in my travels I will visit a Starbucks.
  • One time I accidentally went into a christian coffee shop in Bellingham to get an americano because I was avoiding going to starbucks. It was the worst fucking coffee that I have ever tasted.

    I like the ceremony of stopping for coffee late at night at the rest stops off the 5.
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