wedding story… the end

The next morning we had a very hungover Bridesmaid Brunch at Liz’s. Heather cooked eggs, and by god, it was the first time in my life that I ever enjoyed eating them! I’m not vegan, but I think eggs are weird and generally avoid them. Heather did something magical with a whisk, and next thing you know I’m eating light, fluffy goodness. I’m a new woman, folks. A new egg-eating woman.
Fast forward through lots of preparations and taking of taxis to the rehearsal dinner at 826 NYC, aka the Brooklyn Superhero Supply Store:

We ate much delicious food, and many good friends from Denver showed up, which made me pee-my-pants happy. Now. A few years ago Liz made it know that if she ever got married she wanted a choreographed dance at her reception, like in a teen movie. Ever since her engagement was announced, Heather and I have been planning for this. We watched many dance movies as “research’: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, Dirty Dancing, Flashdance, Fame, Footloose, 13 Going on 30, etc., and had many great ideas. Unfortunately, our Denver friends stole our thunder by creating just such a dance for our friend Andy’s wedding just a couple of months ago. Grr! We were forced to regroup. Footloose was out, so what could take it’s place? After much consideration, we decided on a Medieval Court Dance. A Knight’s Tale is J’s favorite movie (J is the groom, btw), so we knew it would go over well. Only how would we teach it to many guests without the bride and groom copping on? We decided to tell a lie. Or rather, I lied.
I told Liz that I had prepared a song/choral reading (the most obnoxious, flaky thing I could think of, ie Classic Willow), and that she and J needed to leave the Rehearsal Dinner for an hour so I could teach it to the guests. Yes, I made the bride and groom leave their own party. I thought Liz would be pissed in a “why does Willow always make things complicated and dumb?” way, but she actually agreed without a fuss. As soon as they were out the door, Heather and our friend Alana got busy teaching us the routine they’d created:

Note if you will, the bow and curtsy. Oh yeah, we were court dancing. 45 minutes later 12 couples had learned the routine, and we were busy cleaning when Liz and J returned to the party.
Heather and I stayed with Liz in the Bridal Suite that night, all three of us lined up in the lovely king sized bed. The next day was Wedding Day. We all got manicures and pedicures, and the persistent Korean ladies even convinced me to get my legs waxed (I haven’t shaved in six years)! Liz went to get her hair done, and the rest of us started hair and makeup at the hotel. I have been experiencing a 2 month break-out on my forehead, and Kelly scared the shit out of my by insisting that I need to see a dermatologist and go on crazy meds to clear it up. Yikes!!! She also did me the great service or applying my makeup in such a way that said acne was rendered unnoticeable. Thanks, Kel!
Here’s Kelly making up Liz (whose skin was flawless):

Pretty soon we were whisked into a gigantic SUV limousine, where we drank champagne and made many jokes about running away to Vegas instead. Lots of “it’s not worth it, Liz! You’re throwing your life away!” Funny. Once at Prospect Park we did photos and then piled back into the limo while the guests arrived. Liz was not nervous at all, which made us all glad.
Finally the Wedding Captain knocked on the window and told us it was time. Everything after that is a beautiful blur. The ceremony was intimate and very reflective of Liz and J. The officiant (who is a representative of the Brooklyn Ethical Society) read some words that Liz and J had written about each other, and J’s statement made me cry. He described the funny way she shops for groceries and how she is so generous, and such a smart lady, and it was so clear that he “gets” her in the way that you hope your best friend will be gotten someday. I read a poem, Krista and her sisters sang a song, and J kissed the bride. Boom! They were married!
Here is the reception in bullet points:
* I quickly became tipsy (which is maybe why I only remember the reception in bullet points!)
* Many toasts were made, and they were all wonderful and unique, but fit together in a cool way. Mine was a little bit rambling, but no one seemed to mind. Heather talked about when she and Liz were little girls, Kelly about their adventures in college and then as roommates in New York, Krista wrote a hilarious and touching rhyming poem, and Jenny wrapped it all up with a comment on the notion of soul-mates, and how Liz and J gave her hope.
* My old swing dance partner Mitch was there, and we did a lot of fancy dancing when there was no one else on the dance floor. Mild to moderately embarrassing. Whatever.
* Abby made the wedding cake, which was comprised of 200 AMAZING cupcakes. Were they the best cupcakes I have ever eaten? Yes they were. In fact, over the next 24 hours, I ate at least ten. They were that good.
* Liz and J danced to this really sweet song called “You You You You You” by a Magnetic Fields side project, then they danced with their parents to “Dream Operator” by the Talking Heads.
Eventually I took the microphone and said something like this, “Liz, J, this is such a special night. And, I know I made a toast already, but there is so much more I need to say! Can you come up here, please? Thanks. Yeah, so I want to tell you how I feel, but I just don’t have the words… I need some help… I need some friends… I need some music…” The DJ started the song, the dancers gathered on the floor, I lay down the mic, found my partner, and we all bowed and curtseyed. And then we did a court dance. And it was awesome. Liz and J were thrilled, and other guests were bewildered or amused. As soon as I get photos I’ll post them. Friends, I tell you, it was a complete success.
So things wound down, Liz and J went off to the hotel, and a handful of us wound up at a bar a few blocks away. I drank more, started to fall asleep (read: pass out) on my barstool, and we headed back to Kelly’s apartment where I crashed on her bed while dudes partied all around me for another few hours. It was wonderful.