Urban Honking

Subject: Dear Constituent, In response to your email letter From: CongressmanMajor.Owens@mail.house.gov Thank you for your email. I will consider your recommendation when the issue is discussed in Committee and/or when the Bill is brought to the Floor of the House for a vote. I encourage you to take a moment to visit my website, www.house.gov/owens/index.htm. […]

The 5 train at Atlantic-Pacific departs in a slow whine of two notes. They are the exact tones that begin “Somewhere” from West Side Story, the verse that is. A. Juelz Santana is the same height as Riff Raff A2. My Juelz Santana promo whistle is the second most literal promotional item I’ve ever received. […]

Seven hours in crotchless pants with an AK and an audience: arduous, but hardly far-fetched. She is a woman who once displayed herself for 12 days–starving, showering, peeing, sleeping–in bare suffering nakedness, the opposable thumb of the mise en scene. Marina Abramovic, performance artist, is covering famous works in a weeklong series at the Guggenheim, […]

Amanda P, writer of books and nominee on the 2005 ILM “Ladies of Pitchfork: Hot or Not?” thread (live podcast coming ’06), says: “I’ve totally seen that dude with the iguana — he walks [around our neighborhood] with it draped around his neck, like some kind of wicked lizard scarf!” What I meant with the […]

it’s voting day, put it down.

as of late, 50 is the man who couldn’t buy happiness: forever sullen, paranoid. vs. jay, jay owns the universe and is STOKED! The peeping tom with the binoculars from across the courtyard is now duped thanks to drapes and a venetian blind in the kitchen. His giant iguana, about the size of a wiener […]

i spent my sat nite texting w/sean fennessey–him, wifey, and boddingtons at the computer (dateline: Manhattan) vs. me, roommates, corona and diet cola at the kitchen table (dateline: BKLYN)–and all i got was this bright, gleaming bright blogspot. My outgoing messages say: “it’s the hook! the hook is the prob” but i didn’t mean it […]

In the Oct issue of Sister 2 Sister mag, in response to the question “How long have you been rapping,” Lil Nikki answered, “As soon as I came out, the doctor slapped me and I said ‘Yo!” “i spit knives/ first aid gon hafta bandage ya crew”: Lil Nikki, at age 14, bilingual, from Richmond […]