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Pizza is better than coffee.

LelandLeland
edited March 2012
I say this because it is true.
«134

Comments

  • LelandLeland
    1. A pizza tossed in the street becomes an amoeba. Coffee tossed in the street does not.
  • LelandLeland
    2. Pizza will keep you alive. Coffee will only keep you awake until you die.
  • LelandLeland
    3. Lots of ingredients in your pizza? Cool! Lots of ingredients in your coffee? Kinda weird.
  • UncleBoatShoes2011UncleBoatShoes2011
    I'm sorry, Dr. J.

    3. Lots of ingredients on your pizza and the cheese doesn't melt. Never more than 3!

    2. Pizza will keep you alive for a month, then you will die because of stomach anger.
    Coffee will keep you alive for 45 years, BY ITSELF, then you die angry, but at least you got a lot done.

    1. Get out of the street and get in a parking lot (filled with food carts) or in a car or your home or a restaurant. Standing in the street is dangerous.

    Coffee is better than pizza.
  • MatthewMatthew
    If I had to give up one of the two it would surely be pizza.
  • LelandLeland
    "I was pleasantly baked." vs. "I was stuck in the grind."
  • MatthewMatthew
    "I am so full and have indigestion." vs. "I feel so brilliant and ALIVE."

    Snap judgement though. I would miss pizza dearly, but I would give it up over coffee any day.
  • YoursTrulyYoursTruly
    Obviously any reasonable human who was not a crazed dog-abusing serial killer would choose COFFEE over pizza. Pizza would be sorely missed, each and every day, but without coffee civilization would grind to a halt and airplanes would fall out of the sky.

    Also I must disagree, I do think coffee becomes an amoeba if tossed in the street.

    COFFEE
  • Clever_girlClever_girl
    Surely the opinions of those with a caffeine addiction are unfairly biased? You wouldn't ask someone with a heroin addiction what they liked more than heroin, because the answer is nothing.

    As someone who drinks coffee occasionally but isn't addicted, I can definitely say that pizza is better.
  • MirandaJulyMirandaJuly
    I successfully abandoned coffee (leading to much scorn from YT), but could never give up pizza.
  • LelandLeland
    edited March 2012
    Coffee is inherently dangerous. Science and the market have demanded the invention of a decaffinated version of coffee for safety.

    The thought of de-pizzanated pizza is completely absurd! That's because pizza is inherently safe.
  • ed_chigliaked_chigliak
    Fact: If all you eat is pizza, you will get scurvy. Straight up happened to a Reedie, who didn't know why his gums were hurty, etc.

    I like pizza as a concept or password but almost never eat it. It never occurs to me to have a slice? Like, less than once a month do I have pizza. HERESY!

    COFFEE FOREVER!
  • the_owlsthe_owls
    PIZZA
  • LelandLeland
    A responsible parent or teacher would never offer a cup of coffee to a child.

    image

    Pizza is a great part of growing up!

    image
  • Clever_girlClever_girl
    How can the scurvy/pizza thing be true? Scurvy is caused by lack of vitamin C, and tomatoes are a great source of vitamin C! Was this person only eating white pizza?

    I know a guy who ate nothing but noodles for a month, and by the end of the month he didn't need to wipe when he pooped, I guess because of all the starch.
  • Clever_girlClever_girl
    I would probably be vegan if it weren't for pizza.
  • swamp_knobbler_mahanswamp_knobbler_mahan
    The other night at Sushi with Sasha, we were discussing my love for both sushi and pizza and if I had to give one up for the rest of my life, which one would I give up?

    Pizza is more convenient/available/cheap, but sushi is really amazing and tasty and probably brings me more pleasure when eating it. But probably worse for the world in terms of marine life/the biosphere.

    I would definitely give up pizza before coffee.
  • ed_chigliaked_chigliak
    The Reed kid only ate pizza, for months, an entire semester or maybe more. Not sure if it was cafeteria pizza, but apparently even though tomatoes are awesome Vitamin C delivery mechanisms, a thin smear beneath yr cheese is not enough to prevent the scurvy.

    It's true though, no coffee till you're 12, while pizza is perfect for children.

    Cheese vs coffee, that's a hard one.
  • freddyfreddy
    Ed, you just threw me. I would have said coffee > pizza any day, but when you turned it into cheese vs. coffee...I would have to give up the java!
  • 12341234
    Coffee.

    Just based on the conceptual lifestyle I think it's healthier to want uppers than downers.

    And let's be honest, pizza is awesome, but it's going to hurt you and your body.

    I tried putting coffee in my smoothie.

    I would never put pizza in my smoothie.

    I love my pizza. But coffee is family.
  • YoursTrulyYoursTruly
    having been vegan for years, while having never not drank (drunk? jesus) coffee, I can say I would give up cheese before coffee. I am very comfortable with my stance and will not be changing it for god or anybody. Giving up cheese is easy. One month and you're good. Giving up coffee I think would literally turn me into a different person. A better, more likable person? Maybe. But still, a sobering thought.

    I like a little danger in my life! If all you want is tepid softness and you're afraid of a little zing or zazz then go ahead, pizza-preferrers, just go right ahead

    Still heaping scorn on Zuckerberg for his bullshit comments regarding tea. Anyone who says they "switched" to tea and that it's "great" is a FUCKING PSYCHOPATH.

    It's fine if you switch to tea for whatever weird-ass health reasons, but DO NOT YOU DARE to say it's great or fine or even vaguely comparable. IT IS A WHOLE DIFFERENT BALL OF WAX.


    Whereas "switching" from pizza to, like, a sandwich, seems very reasonable to me.
  • YoursTrulyYoursTruly
    Coffee = upper
    Pizza = downer

    you need both, but lets face it in this fast-paced modern world the upper is gonna serve you better in the long run

    I GOT THE BIG PROMOTION
  • 12341234
    Urban Honking needs a "hot or not" style app to compare things like pizza and coffee and bunnies and hot knives cook books.
  • LucyLucy
    Pizza all the way! I've been trying to cut back on my coffee consumption and the less I drink, the more I realize I feel better without it! However, Nick and I eat pizza almost weekly. Without it and burritos, we'd surely starve.
  • YoursTrulyYoursTruly
    Look how incredibly apropos this is!

    http://www.fastcodesign.com/1669313/what-americans-would-give-up-to-keep-the-interne-alcohol-exercise-showers-sex

    ?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!

    AMERICANS BE CRAZY
  • 12341234
    Sometimes when I have a smoothie, I don't have coffee until after lunch.

    This might lead one to think I could give up coffee for smoothies. But that one person would be wrong.

    DEAD WRONG.

    image
  • LelandLeland
    More coffee induced violence. Sad.

    image

    Celebrate life.
  • MirandaJulyMirandaJuly
    LOL
  • MatthewMatthew
    Pizza is liable to turn on you.

    image
  • LelandLeland
    edited March 2012
    @Matthew That is obviously a fictional document based on absurd prejudices that were disproved long ago. 'Facts' of this kind have no place in this debate. Indeed, your profound lack of journalistic integrity does a great disservice to the many conscientious, safety-minded adults (perhaps a little like you) who might occasionally enjoy their beverage of choice in moderation.

    Pizza doesn't make stuff up and pass it off as the truth. Pizza doesn't have to. Pizza is better than coffee.
  • Loose_ThreadLoose_Thread
    I just want to see a fight to the d
  • ThickeningAgentThickeningAgent
    Dr. J is correct.

    if you were stranded on a deserted island and you could choose only one (coffee or pizza) it would obviously be pizza (if you are sane)
  • kdawgkdawg
    The pundits like to slice-and-dice our country into pizza states and coffee states. Well, I say to them tonight, there is not a pizza America and a coffee America — there is the United States of America.
  • 12341234
    I think what we can all agree on is that breakfast is the best meal of the day as it's the perfect meal to have pizza and coffee. Together.

    image

    image
  • MatthewMatthew
    If I was stranded on a deserted island I would miss coffee the most and totally get by without pizza while eating wild boar and coconuts and Jin's fishes.
  • YoursTrulyYoursTruly
    TRUE DAT

    cold pizza + coffee for breakfast though is pretty grand
  • the_owlsthe_owls
    If I were stranded on a desert island I would certainly be dreaming of PIZZA

    image
  • kdawgkdawg
    edited March 2012
    This great local pizza place has a half off deal on mondays. Buy a pizza on monday and you can have it for lunch all week.

    If you don't eat it all before Tuesday's over :(
  • LelandLeland
    image
  • MatthewMatthew
    One of the best things about living in NY is the ubiquitous $1 pizza that isn't half bad.
  • MirandaJulyMirandaJuly
    Yeah the last time I went back there was the first time I saw that, and I wandered around trying to find a more normally priced pizza place because I didn't trust it, but it's edible.
  • MatthewMatthew
    I find that it is on the level of quality of any other midtown-lunch-crowd slices, just like a quarter of the price. I'm sure I will find out that it is made of asbestos and formaldehyde, but until then it is a delish treat for $1.
  • 12341234
    East coast wins the pizza war, west coast wins the coffee war.

    So the real pizza vs. coffee battle area is the middle of the country. And I think pizza is winning?
  • MatthewMatthew
    If pizza is part of the larger pie category and coffee is part of the larger hot caffeinated beverage category, who wins then?
  • Loose_ThreadLoose_Thread
    Matthew, do you ever go to those places where they give you a free pizza with your drink order?
  • distant_shoedistant_shoe
    DUH
    MEGA DUH

    pizza is like all these different things made into a thing that is so fucking awesome

    coffee is just some weird bean, imported via eco-non-friendly shipping and its only one thing. sure it tastes good and gives you some jazz but those defending it here are clearly drug addicts and are not thinking about deep caffein crashes.

    pizza can be so healthy. it gets a bad rap because of all the greasy meat and fatty cheese. get some salad pizza. go whole wheat on it. its still pizza and still i bet you would eat it and like it.

    mmm spinach pizza. mmm pizza

    man i am hungry for pizza

    it is so true what mike said about the smoothie that you don't even need the coffee. but then later if you are a drug addict you are like WAIT I WAS TRICKED I DIDNT GET MY DRUGS?!?! and you cave and have a coffee at like 1pm and then woah nelly you might just fuck up your night cycle

    but that pizza you ate you are totally gonna burn it up or poop that shit out

    unless you are a lazy bum on the laptop on the internet all day talking about pizza vs coffee

    in which case you might start getting a "pizza belt" like i have.
    but that's totally chill and some people will say "YOU LOOK SO GOOD! SO HEALTHY" and by that they will mean you have eaten well

    who ever tells a coffee addict all jittery and nervous that they "LOOK GREAT!"

    happens to the pizza eater all the time

    and also

    if it was 11pm and you were still hangin with bros and someone said

    HEY I JUST ORDERED A HUGE CARRAF OF COFFEE IT'LL BE HERE IN 20

    you would be totally less stoked than the other more obvious call to make


    DUH

    megaduh

    man i am going to go eat pizza right now

    fuck the DMV



  • Loose_ThreadLoose_Thread
    'Dam, you are dropping science today

    Love it

    Does anyone ever call you Dam short for 'Dam short for Dam'
    do you like puns about that
  • LelandLeland
    edited March 2012
    YEah! Got the Champeen comin' off th' bench!

    D'ja save some room for cream there, coffee buddies?
  • kdawgkdawg
    This is just a reminder, UncleBoatShoes told me about the best kind of pizza. Green Pepper and Pineapple! So Good!
  • Clever_girlClever_girl
    pizza wins! pizza wins!
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