Tapped?!! Beer BBQ Sauce

When you fail to finish off a keg, you’ve clearly shirked your responsibilities and there is only one way to redeem yourself: turn it into to a thick and smoky barbecue sauce. Contrary to popular opinion, that brown sugar, hickory ooze is not such a mysterious undertaking. Here’s an intermediate recipe that will make use of those cups of keg beer and boost your self-esteem. The only problem is that once you’re going ape shit, smothering everything in your fridge with this sauce, you’ll wish you had a keg of beer to go with it.
BBQ Sauce
4 cups keg beer (we used Arrogant Bastard)
2 cups whole tomatoes with sauce
2 cups vegetable broth
1 cup apple cider vinegar
3 Tbs. whole grain mustard
3 Tbs. Worcesterhire sauce
1/4 cup brown sugar
3 Tbs. molasses
1/2 white onion, finely chopped
1 bunch celery leaves, finely chopped
6 cloves garlic, minced
2 Tbs. butter or extra virgin olive oil
2 Tbs. smoked salt/hickory liquid smoke
2 Tbs. corn starch
1 Tbs. hot sauce
1 shot bourbon whiskey
Tap what’s left of the keg and throw 4 cups of beer straight into a medium saucepan and onto the stove. Bring it to a slow rolling boil and let go until beer reduces by half. (This recipe will work with the dregs from any keg, but it’s far tastier with a darker, more boozey beer like Stone’s Arrogant Bastard.) Set aside or refrigerate overnight.
When you’re ready to make the sauce, start by heating a large pot with the butter or oil. Toss in the onion, garlic and celery leaves, and cook for five minutes. Pour in the shot of bourbon and cover for one minute. Uncover, add the tomatoes, and let cook for 10 minutes. Once the tomatoes are tender, squish them with a slotted spoon.
In a large measuring cup mix the broth, mustard, Worcestershire, vinegar and hot sauce. Bring the saucepan up to high heat and add the mixture. Once it boils, turn the heat down, add the brown sugar and simmer it for one hour, covered.
The sauce should have reduced by about an inch. Bring the heat up again and add the reduced keg beer and molasses. Let it cook off for about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Taste. If it seems too tart add 1 Tbs. more of molasses.
To thicken it make a slurry. Fill a small bowl with 1/2 cup cold water, add the corn starch, and stir with your hands until milky and without clumps. Bring the sauce up to a hard boil one last time and add the slurry 1 tsp. at a time, stirring vigorously. It should visibly thicken. Set aside to cool, where it will thicken considerably more. Once room temperature, store in jars or bottles and use on everything for a week.
Beverage: Lagunita’s Censored Ale
Soundtrack: Rolling Stones’ Exile on Main Street
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