Monthly Archives: March 2007

open letter to mims

Dear Mims, I believe your A + A = A logic is elemental in creating the social climate in which a man can approach my friend in the club and say, “You’re special. You wanna know why you’re special? Cause … Continue reading

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OPEN LETTER TO IAM

Dear ’90s French rappers IAM, Thank you for having a lead MC (Akhenaton) who looks exactly like present-day Dave One, and for making a video which exactly mirrors my life, minus Dave One. Best, J. Escobedo Shepherd, MD

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OPEN LETTER TO LOU DIAMOND PHILLIPS

Dear Lou Diamond Phillips, When I was like eight I was really into La Bamba and I adored you. I also dug Esai Morales as your smoking hot, drug smuggling JD brother (“by the sweat of my balls” – classic … Continue reading

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OPEN LETTER TO GRIZZLY BEAR

Dear Grizzly Bear, I tried watching you on whatever talk show that was last night but I passed out on the couch before you came on. I don’t remember the guests. The evidence was in my morning face, smooshed and … Continue reading

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OPEN LETTER TO AMY WINEHOUSE

Amy Winehouse, I didn’t go to your show, but my friend Rachael did. And she sent me this letter: “From: Rachael To: Julianne Subject: Someone Send Amy Winehouse to Rehab i think i know her lyrics better than she does. … Continue reading

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OPEN LETTER TO OMARION

Dear Omarion Grandberry, I just want to say I really appreciate all that you do. Thank you, J. Escobedo Shepherd

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MAMAJUANA

The shit is magical, but I would avoid mixing – does not play well with others. The dude who gave it to us touted its aphrodesiacal powers, which my companion – a known stallion of a virile dudefest, or at … Continue reading

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click here for prize

It is brutally nice out, and I’m trying not to sweat the Germans reading my mind. Also, Chingo Bling was in yesterday’s USA Today: we are definitely entering outer limits territory.

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REAL GENIUS

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REAL GENIUS

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