yerple

But anyway, Triple 6 winning an Oscar = glad I couldn’t reach my bookie before the show. The odds were eight trillion to one? Then again, it helped that Dolly’s song was all about Jesus, and the lady who wrote the song for Crash had slightly less melodic resonance than a fly wing. PS, why did they ask the whitest woman that side of Celine Dion to compose the theme song for a film about American race relations? The melting pot: write the music egalitarian = Defang it so the shit doesn’t even register? I mean, can I GET A POLYPHONIC RHYTHM ONE TIME?!–HOLLER AT NED SUBLETTE and THE ORIGIN OF ALL MUSICS, at least! AFROCUBAN RHYTHMS, MI AMIGA! SYNCOPATE! More on this later.
Jon Stewart was hilarious, and the favor was returned with dead fucking silence. His jokes were subtle, sophisticated, and painfully true, like, Life during wartime: Michelle Williams receiving $200,000 giftbag. (As Sally Struthers says, $200,000 will keep an American family of four in health insurance for a half-decade.) The only dude who got Stewart’s stee: George Clooney. [Addendum: and Jamie Foxx and his sister.] Dear Sean Fennessey, loyal and talented friend, I apologize for ever talking shit about your boy. When I grow up I want to marry a man just like Clooney. I adore him. Fat Clooney, Spinal injury Clooney, Ambien Clooney, Dodge Dart Clooney, Flirting with Barbara Walters Clooney, I don’t give a fuck. I’ll take him, in sickness and in health, til death do us part.
Longer letter later, plus Special Guest Blogger Mo’s Oscar thoughts (apparently the guy who won the Oscar for Best Animated Short Film is the selfsame NYU professor who flagrantly put her on Watch for an entire month her freshman year, and she has some things to say about it).

This entry was posted in Opinion. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to yerple

  1. Craig! says:

    I watched the Oscars in a theatre and everyone was howling at Mr. Stewart. Couldn’t hear the silence of the live Kodak Theater crowd, though. Too bad, the man knows his funnies.

  2. Matt says:

    agreed, stewart was perfect (those lobbying clips were lol funny) and clooney is totally my hero. have you seen the website for his production company? totally inspiring and bad-ass. big ups.

  3. lefty politics people happy at Stewart and Clooney? Surprise surprise. Show was aight, a lot of black people mad about rappers singing about pimps, not repping the culture in the ’06, cant we sing some positive music? Oh, what wrong with singinjg about JESUS, thats not cool anymore?

  4. caps says:

    I’m not giving Stewart the pass you are – thought he coulda gone bigger, to be commensurate with the stage. Not one shot at Bush, even when you’re in Hollywood and dude’s poll numbers are Nixon low? Come on dude. I was in Houston looking at middle aged dudes wearin STEWART FOR PRESIDENT shirts and I know they wanted something a little tougher. And what was up with the big politico film clip montage, all inspirin and good and MAD AS HELL, and then immediately followin we’re treated to the motherfuckin prez of the Academy coming out and telling us to keep packing the theatres and leave our portable DVDs on the shelf because social commentary only makes sense when you watch it in a theater with strangers (and pay ten fifty to get in)???? Fuck all that bait-n-switchery. ANYWAYS – what the hell am I doing getting mad because the OSCARS ain’t political enough? 2006 is a rough scene. Plus I didn’t see any of the movies, so what the fuck.

  5. poser-modern says:

    The whole acadamy walked the line. They let the art make the statement and left nothing for the Bill O’Reileys to complain. It was perfect…and a little boring but what’s new. We have no mavericks in the new millenieu.
    Deep thoughts, word twists, and a poem…look who’s blogging now?

  6. caps says:

    I’m just hating cause you shut yr phone off.

  7. wardell says:

    i think clooney went a little overboard with his collective hollywood self-congratulation, bigging up hattie mcdaniel’s ‘gone with the wind’ oscar win along the way. yes, she was the first. but let’s not lose sight of the role she was playing — the only kind of role that hollywood would allow performers like her to play.
    to hear george tell it, hollywood jump-started the civil rights movement and stopped the vietnam war.
    that said, i’d still kick it with him at his italian villa if asked.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *