The Devil has Orcs

GW Bush sighting!!: Coming out of church on 39th and Park around noon today. We didn’t actually SEE him so much as yell—his car was parked in a tent attached to the side door of the church, where he exited unnoticed—but we DID see a secret service-looking dude hand a bag of KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN into the tent. Does GW munch Colonel Sanders so immediately after partaking of Christ’s body? I hope so—that shit causes mad atherosclerosis.
And leaving from the church’s front entrance, because apparently no one wants to harm them: a bevy of Bush’s Orcs, badly dressed, all old white rich-looking white Xtian men, probably praying for apocalypse so they can tear through the flesh of those human suits and finally roam Middle-earth in true demonic form.
Coming soon: guest blogger Steven Lankenau, my roommate (a gay American), on Schwarzenegger, the term “girly-man,” and the oppressive reinforcement of patriarchy. Don’t sleep!