Another Tuesday At Green Dragon

8/1000: THE BARONS OF SCHWARZ
“Baron’s Schwarz” – a beer with a noble yet vaguely obscene name. A beer that smells like smoke. Bartenderman says it’s a “dark lager,” but we can’t help but think of porter when we sniff it.
Mike: I like it.
Josh: You have to say something more interesting than that.
Mike: I like it … a lot?
Josh: I had a Russian porter a couple weeks ago that this reminds me of. I think it was called Baltica 6. Which is an incredibly cool name. But it was thin and it didn’t leave an impression. It’s like it was watery even though it was a dark porter. This has the smokiness in common with the Baltica, but it’s chewy and it has a really pleasant aftertaste.
Mike: I just burped a little bit of it, and it tasted really good.
Mike: I don’t have a really good flavor vocabulary.
Jessica: I was just talking about that with Josh. When I blogged about cheese, I found I had very few terms to describe cheeses. They were always “nutty,” “creamy,” or “stinky.”
Josh: Okay, so when do we think we’d want this beer?
Mike: I had just had it with some sausage, and that worked great.
Jessica: It makes sense that it would go with sausage, cause they’re both German. Traditionally. Lagers and sausages.
Josh: When else would you want that beer again?
Mike: I would like to try it with things, like chocolate cake.
Jessica: I think it’s an autumn beer. It could make that transition nicely, when you don’t want summer, crisp, bright flavors, but you’re not in your porter mood yet.
Josh: I could see it going well with nuttier hard cheeses, like Gruyere, or those Basque sheep’s milk cheeses.
9/1000: Captured by Porches Amber
Josh: What is “Captured by Porches”?
Mike: They were the Clinton St Brewery?
Josh: But what does that mean?
Mike: I know there’s this guy in Portland who will come to your party and serve you beer. He’ll sell beer for your party. I thought this was that guy. We should look it up.
Jessica: He might have gotten shut down by the OLCC already. That doesn’t sound legal.
Mike: I think he was responsible — he checked IDs. It was designed more for house shows and house parties. And I think he biked!
Jessica: Then he’s okay!
Josh: We need to look this guy up for Portland’s Future Awesome.
Josh: I find the beer pretty unremarkable. It doesn’t really stay with me.
Mike: Is it maybe the order we’re drinking them in?
Jessica: I’m clearing my palate with mayonnaise… It has a really nice presentation, but then it goes away. It tastes good! But then, eh.
Josh: I looked it up, and what you’re saying seems to be true, Mike. He is a homebrewer who runs beer for house shows. But Clinton St has his beers at their pub attached to the theater, too. We should check on the bike thing. Cause that sounds awesome.
10/1000: Black Bear Nitro Stout

Mike: Black Bear? We like those guys, don’t we? Oh wait, I’m thinking of Bear Republic.
Jessica: I would like to try the same beer nitro and non-nitro some time.
Mike: Whoa, that tastes like sunflower seeds. Do you get that at all?
Jessica: No.
Mike: That weird saltiness that is in your mouth after you suck on a sunflower seed for a long time. Sunflower residue.
Josh: Let’s get eight ounces more.
[Eight ounces more arrive.]
Josh: That is a beautiful creamy head.
Mike: It looks wonderful.
Jessica: Gorgeous.
Josh: Okay, who wants a beer mustache?
Mike: I think you should cause you have a mustache.
Josh: I think Jessica should, cause she can’t grow a mustache!
Josh: Whoa, it tastes rusty. Like hard water. A flavor I know well from my childhood.
Jessica: But it doesn’t have that horrible sulfur taste that your childhood water had.
Josh: It’s that iron-y taste.
Jessica: Like blood!
Josh: Yeah, that’s the same thing. The iron in both.
Mike: I like that! Like when you cut yourself and you taste the blood. Does this have iron in it?
Jessica: They should prescribe this beer for ladies during their special time in the month.
Mike: So you don’t like the blood beer?
Josh: No, cause it really does stay with me. I have it in the back of my throat right now.
Mike: I like that.
Josh: I know, you said that. I think you’re part vampire.
Mike: Let’s make sure to look up later if there’s some iron or something in it. Why would it be so recognizable?
Josh: I think it could be related to the water.
Jessica: I’ve had other beers with this flavor, but only stouts, I think. So that makes it seem like it’s not the water.
11/1000: Lagunitas Lumpy Gravy
Mike: I just want to say right up front, that’s a bad name for a beer. Cause I’ve had that Jones gravy soda, and that was just awful.
Jessica: A lot of these names are trying pretty hard.
Mike: Brew dudes, they’re weird. Their whole Grateful Dead thing. This sounds like a Ben & Jerry’s flavor.
Jessica: Like Lumpy Humpy.
Josh: They’re faced with the problem of giving their beer a memorable name, and they’re not marketing guys. They’re brew dudes.
Jessica: And beers named by marketing guys are lame. Like fake micros.
Mike: I’m going to clear my palate, with some mayonnaise.
Josh: We haven’t said anything about this beer yet.
Mike: I haven’t gotten anything — I couldn’t smell it at all. It sort of tastes a little like medicine. I don’t think I like it.
Josh: I see this as a session beer. It’s not trying to blow you away with its flavor. But a more interesting one than the Paranoid India Pale Ale we had at Hot Lips.
12/1000: Fish Tale Pale Ale
Josh: I have had this in bottles. Never on tap. It tastes fresh! Dry and hoppy.
Mike: I say “bright and shiny!” I like it a lot, and it’s so different from what we were just drinking.
Josh: I could see not having tons to say about this beer…
Jessica: But that doesn’t mean you don’t love it.
Josh: Yeah. This beer knows what it’s doing.
Jessica: You’ve never been specifically excited about Fish Tale before.
Josh: Right now, on tap, and very cold, it tastes very crisp and refreshing.
Mike: It would be good in the summer, clearly.
13/1000: Anchor Bock
Josh: And now for a complete change in direction. Cherries. It sticks to the roof of your mouth.
Mike: Yeah, dark cherries. This is traditionally a winter beer?
Josh: Yeah, bock and dopplebock are late fall and winter beers.
Mike: It’s almost too sweet.
Josh: Yeah, you described the Lumpy Gravy as medicinal, but I’d say this tastes far more medicinal.
Mike: It would be fun to pair it with food, though, with that sweetness.
Josh: What would you pair it with?
Mike: I don’t know how food pairings work. Do you contrast or complement or what? Maybe just with cherries.
Josh: As I taste it again, I’m stuck on cherries. This is a cherry-flavored beer. But not like Starburst.
Mike: No, like real cherries.
Jessica: More like dried cherries. Not like Kriek. That cherry beer.
Josh: Okay, quick, cause we have to catch our bus: under what circumstances would you want to drink this beer?
Mike: Experimental circumstances. When I could try it among an array of food.
Jessica: I think after dinner, winter evening, it could stand on its own.
Mike: Like a fireplace beer?
Jessica: Yeah!
987 to go!