doing jokes at my dr's expense (my dr is an expense, get it.)
Archived from April 07, 2006
Hi, this is me trying out some jokes on my doctor, Dr. Karp.
Dr.: So, what are we seeing you for today?
Me: Well, I'll tell you, Mike -
Dr.: Don't call me Mike.
Me: I'll tell you, Michael -
Dr.: Call me Dr Karp
Me: No prob Dr K.
Dr: Karp
Me: No problemo, Karp
Dr: Dr Karp
Me: Sure, D.K. The trouble is my leg is on the fritz again. It just gave out on me. I'm like a teenager and all of a sudden the golden years are sneaking up on me and giving me a hip fracture or something. It's rough. I'm not even paying for this with Medicare, but apparently I should be! Hopefully an elder care transit van will be picking me up after this appointment...
Dr: Hmmm. Yes.
Me: Hey Circle K, (then I sucked in my cheeks and made a "fish face")
Dr: What are you doing?
Me: I'm speaking your language, eh Karp? Ha!
Dr: I've never heard that one all through primary, secondary, post-secondary and medical school.
Me: Yeah, it just came to me.
Dr: Well, let's take a look.
Me: You know what would really make this room better... KARP-et.
Dr: Hmmm.
Me: If you were a proctologist I bet everyone would call you Dr Krap. Oh, that is a good one. I actually knew some kids at 4-H camp whose last name was Krap, but it had two p's. Krapp.
Dr: That's a tough name.
Me: Tell me about it, Karp. The only good thing about it is that it spelled "PARK" backwards, and everyone loves it when they can find a good place to Park - o le!
Dr: Yeah, or else they're Korean.
Me: Whoa, Doc, you're one-upping me over here.
Dr: Well, I am a Dr. I have an amazing intellect.
Me: And I bet you're a better fisherman too, eh Karp?
Dr: Yes, I broke from the Karp family tradition of fishing our own kind.
Me: Yowsers, Karp-le tunnel syndrome, you are ruling me right now.
Dr: Well, you hit on something. We were a major section of transit on the Underground Railroad, the Karpel Tunnel.
Me: I thought you guys were map makers, you know, Karptologists.
Dr: You're thinking of Karptologists, decoders skilled in the analysis of codes and cryptograms.
Me: Don't you mean Karptograms?
Dr: I do.
Me: Hey, does anyone ever come in here and call you KARP-E-DIEM?!
Dr: Now THAT is a good one!
Dr&Me: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
Me: I love having you as a doctor!
Dr: And I love having you as a patient!
Dr&Me: HURRAY FOR PRIVATE MEDICAL INSURANCE!!!! WE HATE HMOs!!!
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