Lauderdale Don't Stop Rocking the Cuties.
Posted by: steve
On awesome Florida family vacation I found myself with an afternoon by myself in Fort Lauderdale. I sat and watched crunk 70s cruise ships and party boats roll up and down the intercoastal waterway and listened to hip hop and came to a few realizations:
1. Kanye West made the first rap song about "mamas" that has actually touched me. I was listening to what I thought were some tracks from Kanye's upcoming album, Late Registration. "Hey Mama" is simply what makes the pink polo preppy rapper so great....amazing upbeat production, evocative emotional lyrics that show that he is actually a human being as opposed to so much of rap that tries to build the rapper into the unfeeling indestructible money loving woman digesting monsters. I know this is not really a new concept, but with a fare amount of Kanye backlash floating in the ether these days I just get more and more strident that he is really a great thing for hip hop.
2. I like The Game. This is probably due to residuals from the 50 Cent aka Dr. Mean Gross Buff Dude (why are so many rappers so overly ripped??) debacle. I mean you sorta have to pick a side, and I'm certianly not going with the guy who dissed Jada. The Game is so different than 50, though. He is so respectful to his influences as to where it seems as if 50 couldn't care less. The Game only got into a beef with 50 by saying he didn't want to beef with Jada and Fat Joe and Nas. Also, The Documentary is much better than The Massacre. 50's second mainstream album feels so dead, much like 50's trademark dead sounding non inflection voice, while The Game is like a powder keg (at least in attitude), hardly able to be contained. He's been waiting for this moment for so long and now it's finally here. 50 does have some quality contributions to The Game's album, but it's the excitable West Coaster and the production that makes Docu so much better. 50s singles are sooo weak, "Candy Shop" is just "Magic Stick" lite and "Disco Inferno" is a total snore. The Game's 1st 2 singles ("How We Do" and "Hate It Or Love It") are both single of the year candidates, which ironically both feature 50. But dude, The Game is seriously ugly. MEAN MUG.
No more ugly dudes. I got some flack from some "real" hip hop fans on GBoAT for calling some rappers cute. In response.
Uncle Boat Shoes TOP 5 CUTE DUDE RAPPERS:
5. NAS - There is nothing cuter than when Nas gets all positive and for the kids.
4. JADAKISS - That funny cough/laugh thing he has started doing is so awkward and cute.
3. THE CLIPSE - CRIT - TERS
2. MANNIE FRESH - "Belly real big" Hee hee hee.
1. MIKE JONES - Never in doubt. Giving out your own phone number in all your songs = CUTE. Repeating yourself A LOT = CUTE. Saying you don't want to have beef with Chamillionaire, but then calling him out for working at Babies' R ' Us = DOUBLE CUTE
Alpha Male Plane Cryer
Posted by: steve
I will cry at a good movie, but everytime I hop on one of these <---- it's mega water works. Anything, and I mean ANYTHING can make me cry on a plane. I think I even cried at Lindsay Lohan's Freaky Friday on a plane. It's totally weird, but I'm not alone. I have been told by two other "dudes" who will remain nameless that their ducts go all loosey goosey when they get up to 30,000 ft. Does anyone know what the deal is?? Does anyone else experience this? Are we more succeptable emotionally at altitude? Or is it just being trapped in a tin can with nothing else to do?
So, today, on what seemed like the never-ending flight I was "forced" to watch a movie I didn't want to see at all. Old Johnny Deep and that actually always pretty awesome Cate Blanchett totally made me cry like 3 different times! WHY WAS HE SO NICE TO THOSE KIDS!?!? SHE TOTALLY LOVED HIM!!! CRY CRY CRY!! Stoic dude next to me is like.....wha? Why couldn't they just show me 10 episodes of King of Queens??!??!?! That never makes me cry! I almost cried at an episode of Seinfeld on the plane today. That is deep dudes. Seinfeld is most amazing but not crying amazing. Did anyone cry when Seinfeld did those clip shows at the very end and they used that Green Day ballad to be sappy?? That seemed like such a weird joke. Like they were actually trying to get sentimental at that point. Weird call. Or Awesome Joke? You decide.
