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Challenge 1: Thom's Entry by Thom

February 27, 2006 10:38 PM Permalink

Attn: Jona, Mike, Steve

Re: Ultimate Blogger 3

Keyword: Bigger


Hello Jona, Mike, and Steve. Let us be the first to congratulate you on the success of Ultimate Blogger. It is a truly beautiful thing. We cried. No, really, These are real tears - but not of sorrow. No. These are the tears of purest joy.

The competition has captured the imagination of the average person on the street. As you are probably well aware, the average person on the street is THE target market for most advertisers. Now that Ultimate Blogger 2 is well under way, the question on most people's lips is, "Where will they go from here?" Well, we're here to provide the answer, and the answer is UP.

Why choose us? We think our reality show track record speaks for itself. Remember "What Happens When We Touch You There?" That was our idea. How about "So You Want to Marry a Cripple?" That wasn't our idea. Because that's just in bad taste. You need to draw a line somewhere.

So when we were asked to brainstorm on Ultimate Blogger 3 one idea immediately jumped to the forefront. Are you ready for this? You're not ready. We can tell. Wait - now you're ready. Check this:

Image hosting by Photobucket

Ultimate Blogger 3: Blog Brother

That's right - we get the contestants into a loft in Portland and watch their every move, broadcast right here on the World Wide Web. Our tech guys insist there's a technology called "web cams", and by using these "web cams" you can broadcast in real time online. And apparently it's really popular with teenage boys who, we don't need to tell you, are THE target in the target market.

The key is in capturing their imagination, and we know we can do that with the inherent drama of 12 bloggers all living together. Don't believe us? Peep this sample video homestyles!


View this clip on Vimeo

Now imagine that for 24 hours straight. Internet reality show gold!

But the real moneymaker for any successful show is the cross-marketing. We're talking pencil cases, mouse pads, commemorative plaques. But that's not all. We're currently in talks with...no. This is too hot for you. It will scorch you completely.

Oh what the hell: We're currently in talks with James Blunt--that's right, THE James Blunt--to rework his hit single into a theme for the show. BOOYAH! We had our crack team of in-house musicians work up this ditty - we know you'll agree it's a winner:

Ultimate Blogger 3 Theme - Your Blog is Beautiful

Time is of the essence boys. We can make millions. Get back to us.

Sincerely,

Thomas Bartholomew Wong
CEO
Gin + Juice Productions
"Number one with a bullet baby! Are you picking up what we're laying down?"

By: Thom | Challenge 01 | February 27, 2006

Comments:

Can I be the guy who makes all the white girls go, "we don't feel safe in the house with him around?"

1 Eric 11:01 PM on 02/27/06

I knew I stayed up until 2:00 in the morning for a reason. This entry was awesome. I'm not sure if I like the song or the video better, but I guess I don't really have to decide. The video was dead on, though. That's pretty much every conversation I have with my roommate.

Way to represent the minorities. I give it two Thoms up. I know you probably don't pronounce your name that way, but I'm barely conscious here. That's the best I could come up with.

2 Sonny 11:13 PM on 02/27/06

Wow. This entry makes me so glad I wasn't selected to be in the competition. Seriously, I would feel so inadequate. Way to take the piss out of James Blunt AND capitalize on The Song That Will Not Die all at once. Brilliant

3 lucie 11:52 PM on 02/27/06

Wow nice.

Also I do like that song don't kill me kthx. I mean the real one but this one is also cool!

Plus I may have a small penis.

4 waferbaby 2:24 AM on 02/28/06

I'm taking the closet space!

Good one!!

5 Zoe 6:06 AM on 02/28/06

Whoa! Well done. Great actors.

6 Tim 10:55 AM on 02/28/06

Very nice! Haha. The video and the song are wonderful.

7 Joey 11:31 AM on 02/28/06

I'd write something intelligent and witty if I wasn't so choked up by that song.
Brilliant!

8 Justus 12:18 PM on 02/28/06

wow, nice!. yours makes that other blog brother project look like a pile of puke.

9 greg 3:17 PM on 02/28/06

Awesome! Deep! Amazing!

10 Joel Conrad Bechtolt 5:50 PM on 02/28/06

Thank you for the kind words. I too like the song, so there's no shame in that. I can neither confirm nor deny the penis assessment.

Yet.

11 Thom 7:33 PM on 02/28/06

Thom--
Your video reminded me of a lifelike documentary. Keeping it real, dude!!

12 S.G. Pierce 9:39 AM on 03/01/06

inspired. . . truly inspired. . .
glad to see you're using all that free time constructively. . .

13 karysma7 10:33 AM on 03/01/06