PLAYBOYS & PAGERS
Posted on: May 6, 2005 7:59 PM
(click picture now!)
The embryo years of 1990's in my area was marked by the rise and fall of the pager. Every ultra masculine of Grodno was to fashion it upon the discotek if he must be considered total playboy! I was one of these playboys. The pager, it provided me with multiples of womanfolk for the first eras of my large manhood. It bring me love. It bring me sex. It took my grandmother's money. And then it broke my heart...
My friend Ivan was the first. When he installed his premiere in "Malinka" bar (the local at Vasilishki) I make the green eyes to him on the spot and later I punch him. How could I be without these awesome technics? So I think some time to find high profit job and then disbursed my grandmother's pension into my new toy. It quickly become a most supreme revolutionary thing for me! I communicate through cipher with legions of the opposed genders and invent super-potent and, dare I say, total abnormal code for all my sexes! But the real joker of my pager was this: with it I must run many parallel erotical adventures in simultaneous and have my instruments all over the shops!
These pagers, they made facile the complex of sex and rural warfare. You get a 690, you know you will beat high scores tonight! You send a 691, you can be 100% that you will be acquainted with something extra amazing! You get a 510 and you assemble your pitchforks toward Vasiliy's collective farm... I made swift to develop the playboy reputations throughout the North Western lake district border zone of Byelorussia. No woman's body was alienated from me. No woman was unfamiliar with my special code names for suchlike "ultimate nosedive" and "ruminating the hairy trumpet". But my glory lives were short, and soon came the mobile telephone. Suddenly I could not be freed of being talked at by my womans, soon they would be aware of all the others. I had to lower my performances, and in the end, abandon the life of total primo playboy that the pager had bestowed to me. I raise my glass to these forgotten years, as a tear of old sex comes in my eyes...
(click for translation of pager codes. I add that the English is much less evocative and masculine parlance than the Byelorussian, so translations must be approximate).
im very impressed lyova (and happy that you exercise caution in your sexual escapades). im very impressed by your music as well. may i ask who the original artist is? i'd like to see if i could find some more on solarseek.
Posted by: james at May 7, 2005 1:33 AM
Lyova, you are fucking killing me. Are you real? Are you really real?
Your song is pure genius! I think you might be Eugene Hutz's long lost bratr.
If by some slim chance you don't win this competition, please PLEASE promise all your loyal new fans that you'll start a blog.
p.s. Dnes ti to velmi slusi! Byla jste nekdy v praze? mejte se hezky! hodne stesti! Toto je muj krasny cesky, ale bohuzel polske ne, ruske ne.
Posted by: courtney at May 7, 2005 4:06 AM
Great post Lyova, but I have to admit I'm a litlle confused. About your pager codes thing, in byelorussian there's 2 sentences, in english "bring tissues". Only 2 words ???
What is the real translation of the "masculine and evocative" original, come on.
almost a fan
Posted by: boggart at May 7, 2005 8:06 AM
From Friendfinder.com
This is HOT!
30 year old Man in Vasilishki, Belarus
Looking For: Women for a short term relationship, a long term relationship or marriage.
Profile for Lyova:
I make to be "totally awesome Loverman", who escape the North Western Lake District border zone of Byelorussia because my body was become too notorious and, dare I say, widespread in all neighbouring countryside and metropolis. I now settle on Japan with model sister's income and pursue multifarious adventure here, in streets and also in supreme nightclub, yes? And I have also very great manhood for entertainment and forcefullness!
Ideal Person:
My woman must always make me feel the "total man" and produce primo in bed and in all other areas. She must also make superlative cooking at every hour. It is also a bonus if she can teach me new utilities, such as Japanese language or exotic dancer, ok? She must be open for much nightlife but must also have maternity for me, because I have a magnanimous and infantile heart of softness (sometimes).
Please sent me your foto, and I will give mobile numbers for promt sampling of produce!
Lyova's Information:
Gender: Man
Birthdate: December 11, 1974
(30 years old)
Lives in: Vasilishki, Belarus
Height: Prefer not to say
Body Type: Ample
Smoking: I'm a heavy smoker
Drinking: I'm a heavy drinker
Race: Caucasian
Speaks: English
Education: Prefer not to say
Marital Status: Prefer not to say
Occupation: sister is model
Religion: Other
Have Children: Prefer not to say
Want Children: Maybe
Send Lyova an email:
To respond to Lyova, just type in your handle and password below. If you are not a FriendFinder member, click here to join for free!
Friendfinder.com
Posted by: Everyone to Get From Street! at May 7, 2005 9:39 AM
Lyova,
I used to be a chef and now I'm an exotic dancer. We're destined to be together.
mimix
Posted by: mimi at May 7, 2005 12:41 PM
Dear Boggart,
I would very much enjoy divulging to you my awesome language, but I fear this would look too pungent on this site... So I send you email with this litteral translation, ok?
Mimi, yes I feel this since ultimate beginning... We will one day produce the godly thrusts of raptured, ok?
James, you must check out these Ruki Vverh especially, which make total dance techno... But there are others I can develop to you, or look into the audioscrobbler.
Lyova Lyubov
Posted by: Lyova Lyubov at May 7, 2005 1:33 PM
Lyova, My Friend,
Fuckin' A. I don't care about anything when I'm listening to a song like the one you did. Best post in here. Bar none. I haven't even read what you said, I only heard the song. At first I hated it, because I hated you for being so good. Then, I took a nap and listened again. Then I made Sara listen again. Then we cried laughing. Then I voted to have you removed. See ya, comrade!
Love Always,
Joel "Comrade" Bechtolt
Posted by: Joel Conrad Bechtolt at May 7, 2005 3:33 PM
Was that MP3 always on there? I don't remember seeing this on here when the article was posted.
The song is amazing. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.
Posted by: josh at May 7, 2005 5:05 PM
Courtney! Czech language is similar to Polish (which I speak from my maternal extraction), but more different from Byelorussian. I have never been to Prague however...
Joel. You are total amazing....I am at loss of wordiness!
Josh. In factual, I build much of this post around the audio. My idea is that the reader listens to the pager part and consults the codes to understand what I am talking of. I also sing along over these songs, but the bombastic idea to write my own improvisations hit me between foreheads only a few hours before this dead line. I was with a friend drinking, and it was really just like joke! I am overjoy that you like it.
Lyova Lyubov
Posted by: Lyova Lyubov at May 7, 2005 5:26 PM
Lyova,
I like what you said. I like that when you make jokes, art happens. I want to be more like that. Joke on, player, it can only get better for us all.
Love,
Joel
Posted by: Joel Conrad Bechtolt at May 7, 2005 5:37 PM
Sooo funny. Goddamn, Lyova. Goddamn.
Crying Laughing Again,
Joel
Posted by: Joel Conrad Bechtolt at May 7, 2005 5:44 PM
I need to inform you all that I must post less now because I will be enjoying and toiling in Bangkok for some days (I return wednesday). I go there in primary for visa purpose, so it must not be total awesome fun. But it is a new place for me, so it will also blow my mind. I will hope to tell you more after I arrive there.
My plane will take to the sky in only three hour, so I have to be speedy!
Posted by: Lyova Lyubov at May 8, 2005 1:00 AM
OH MY WORD!!
This is truly amazing!
Posted by: Loyal Lyova Fan at May 6, 2005 7:52 PM