True Fan

Why MLS to Portland is a Good Idea

2009-01-04T09:00:00Z

Here's what it boils down to: a business owner who rents a city facility is asking the city to upgrade said facility, and build another, using bonds that will be repaid by said owner's newfound ability to earn more revenue using the upgraded facilities. Should the city issue the bonds? I'm going to tell you why I think they should. The particulars of the deal and the current state of the process you can read about here, here, and here, so I won't repeat them. Paulson and the city haven't released the intricate details of their negotiations, but the basic thrust is that $85 million in bonds will be used to upgrade PGE Park and build a new, smaller baseball park in either Lents, the Rose Quarter, or another site altogether. Where exactly that baseball park gets built is less urgent, since the main decision here is whether or not to build it at all. I've written this post into three parts, here's some linky action to those parts: I, II, III. And once you're done reading, you can then attend the next MLS Task Force meeting at City Hall this Tuesday, the 6th. Fun begins after the jump! ]]> Part I: The Stadia The Up-Front Cost So, $85 million.... a lot of money? Not when you consider what it's buying. When you compare what other cities have put down for stadia, Portland would be getting an absolute steal. Take a look at some past MLB stadium deals, or the NFL, or the NBA. Granted, this data was compiled in 2002 and 2003, but do you think prices have magically fallen? A new stadium for the Cincinnati Reds in 2003, $361 million, of which the county paid $300 million. Pac Bell Park in San Francisco in 2000, built for $306 million, which the city paid $15 million of. Or heck, look at the entries in wikipedia for baseball venues or NFL stadia (which cite external sources now, of course). The DC Nationals had the city pour in $611 million for Nationals Park. $850 million gets you Citi Field for the NY Mets, $450 of which comes from the city. Speaking of Sodom on the Hudson, the new Yankee Stadium reportedly cost $1.6 billion(!), with $220 million of that coming from the city. The University of Phoenix built a stadium for the Cardinals that cost $455 million. Gillette stadium in Foxborough, MA cost $355 million. Qwest Field just to the north of us required $300 million. I think you get the picture. Getting ONE stadium built for any of the other major league sports is going to cost 3 or 4 times the total of this proposal, and we'd get two separate major and minor league venues out of it. Which of course raises the question, are Merritt's figures off? I'm not going to discount cost overruns, fluctuating prices of steel and other raw materials, or other setbacks making this figure premature, but if you don't believe the numbers are right, do you really believe they're off the mark by 300-400%? Bring Major League Education to Portland "I don't want my tax dollars to be used on sports when there are potholes to fill and schools to fund." Hey, I totally agree! And I'm pretty sure Merritt agrees, too. That's why he's asking the city to issue bonds that will be repaid through higher rent, ticket surcharges, hotel taxes, player income taxes (given, though, that the last one is pretty low for players not named Darren Beckman). Now, is the city on the hook for these in the unlikely event the Timbers or MLS fold? I don't want them to be, either, and I think the city's MLS Task Force absolutely should pin Merritt down on this and find a way to back the bonds that doesn't require any use of the city's general fund. Is this possible? I'll leave it to the people smarter than me to tell me so. The last remodel was quite a raw deal for the city, and legislators should obviously be gun shy on this for that reason. But I think this proposal is quite different from the last go-round because of the unique situation with MLS, which I'll get into below. But absolutely, the council needs to be very thorough and make sure they're not entering a similar deal as with Glickman and the PFE. Common sense demands it. But on the flipside, the council shouldn't let the past missteps blind them to the opportunity here. Naming the Task Force was an excellent way for the council to examine this deal exactly for the kinds of mistakes that doomed the last PGE Park remodel. The Alternative? A common refrain heard from opponents of this proposal is that if Merritt thinks this is such a good deal, why doesn't he just pay for the renovations himself? Well, the city owns PGE Park, and from what we average citizens can tell, it's not interested in selling. The city would rather keep collecting rent on the property, and that rent goes way up after renovations. Also glossed over in this argument is the fact that Paulson will be putting down $40 million of his own money to procure the MLS team. Merritt has put up some good faith efforts since buying the teams, including paying down outstanding debt repayments from the last remodel (something he had no obligation to do). But let's say the city decides not to do this deal. What vision do the opponents of this deal have for PGE Park? The Timbers' attendance has been growing steadily, but after a while, it will top off given the second division league they play in and lack of marquee opponents. Say it tops off at 13,000 a game (and I think that's generous for a USL side, myself). The Beavers' home attendance hasn't budged in quite a while from its steady 5,000+ per game average. Remember, the stadium as it's currently configured seats 19,500. Beavers games are cavernous, empty affairs, and the Timbers suffer from an awkwardly laid out seat configuration and a patchwork field coverings on the pitchers mound and base areas. Neither team has it very good in this, the current situation. But on the other hand, if the renovations provide an east side stand, a permanent rectangle field, and a new ballpark for the Beavers gives their steady fans a properly-sized home (and a new source of rent revenue for the city), both venues can fill their capacity better on game days, and both sports are showcased in their best possible light. Let's also remember that PSU football uses the stadium, too, and are reportedly very supportive of the proposal. If they really want a Division I football program, this stadium paves part of that road and becomes a very good recruiting tool for the school. "No Economic Impact" I've been reading lately the argument that it's been "proven" that sports stadiums provide no discernable economic benefit to their communities. Now, I haven't read the study, and I don't doubt that the researchers certainly did their homework, but I'm wondering from my own experience how exactly this was quantified. Anecdotes not being the plural of datum, of course, but when I go to a Timbers game, I (with wife and daughter sometimes) get into the neighborhood about an hour early, hit one of the fine local dining (or drinking) establishments nearby and drop $30-40 on dinner and drinks. I know I'm not the only one who has this routine, and I live on the east side, so it's not like I'm going to be headed into northwest or the pearl otherwise (or at least as often). Indeed, I probably wouldn't be eating out if it weren't for gameday. So how does this pattern, repeated over some not-insignificant percentage of fellow fans, and repeated again and again over the course of a season, not result in an economic impact? Part II: Why is MLS a Good Idea? The League is Not Failing "Soccer is the sport of the future. Always has been, and always will be." For starters, I'm going to tell you the truth. Soccer is not the next big thing, and it doesn't need to be. In 1993, as a condition of the USA hosting the World Cup, MLS was founded as the first top level soccer league in the country since the NASL went under in the 80's. The first season was played in 1996 to full stadia across the country, many fans eager to see what top-level, non-World-Cup soccer looked like. It wasn't pretty (and I'm not just talking about the inaugural uniforms. Yee-gawds). Even setting aside the odd rule changes (clocks winding down instead of up, no stoppage time at the end of halves, shootouts to decide draws), the quality was a mixed bag. For every Etcheverry and Valderrama there were 10 other schlubs (ok, they were college products, but for the gulf in talent they may as well have been local plumbers from the sunday leagues), making the promise of a league with high quality quite laughable. The fans responded in droves away from the games, and by 2001, the league was in dire finances. It was at this point that if the league was going to fold, it would have done so in 2001. I'll repeat that for emphasis: if the league was going to fold, it would have done so in 2001. Instead, what happened was that the two largest billionaire backers, Philip Anschutz and Lamar Hunt, decided to push ahead. They could have just ended it there, cut their losses, and decided once again that soccer wasn't going to work in the US. But they saw enough potential to rework their business plan and soldier on. But at this point, there were only 3 owners for the league's 10 teams, and only one stadium that a team actually owned. Teams renting cavernous NFL stadia were bleeding money, like a purported half million per game for Giants Stadium in the Meadowlands. The league was paying ESPN for airtime! Roads to profitability in that environment are quite difficult to find. Now the league has 14 owners for its 16 teams, and TV rights contracts with ESPN, Fox Soccer Channel, HDNet, Telefutura, and may be about to sign an 8-figure deal for international rights. Adidas signed a 10-year contract to outfit the league worth $150 million. New owners include well-backed investors like Toronto's Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment, the Oakland A's' Lew Wolff, Hollywood mogul Joe Roth, and boxer Oscar de la Hoya. Add to that the seven stadia MLS teams have built. In Denver, Salt Lake, LA, Chicago, Dallas, Columbus, and Toronto, these teams now have properly-sized venues that, more importantly, allow them to control costs by eliminating or reducing rent, and retain more revenue from parking and concessions. MLS eventually changed its sponsorships to allow a main sponsor logo to be placed on the front of the jerseys. While you can decry this as unseemly corporate whoring, you can't deny that it's meant money in the bank for teams, as this table shows (also, you're not allowed to denounce it and then turn around and ask how soccer's supposed to make money when they can't cut to commercials). All of these points together change the profitability equation immensely. We don't know exactly whether the entire league is profitable yet (it's probably not, in absolute balance sheet terms... the New York Red Bulls still play in Giants stadium, after all. Although when Red Bull Park opens in Harrison, NJ next year, you can imagine one gigantic sucking sound on the MLS balance sheet will cease.), but certainly many individual teams are profitable and have seen their valuations rise significantly. But why did I start this by saying soccer isn't the Next Big Thing? Because here's the thing: it doesn't need to be. Where the business plan of soccer specific stadia coupled with modest TV rights and jersey sponsors gets you is a place of self-sufficiency. There are plenty of fans of soccer in this country who want to see a home-grown product. Soccer, and MLS specifically, doesn't need to upend the sports order, and upending the sports order necessarily means MLS has to contradict its slow and steady growth (and their plan to continue same). No, it's not as good as the European leagues. It won't be for some time, if ever. No, it doesn't need to be. The Ducks or the OSU Beavers play in a conference doubtfully as good as the NFL, and yet continue to do well in the fan support category. All MLS needs, and I think they already have it, is a sustainable plan to exist and keep existing in the future. Don't let the Freddy Adus or Daniel Beckhams distract you. Part III: What Will MLS Do For Portland? Last year's Timbers finished in last place in the scrappy USL First Division. This after finishing the previous year in second place and being denied a trip to the championship game, losing the semifinal on penalties. The year before that, last place. Last, second, last. Other than two exceptional seasons, in fact, the Timbers have been, well, pretty lousy. I'm one of their biggest fans, but let's face it, they don't have a lot to show, trophy-wise, for the 8 years they've been back. But last year saw the largest season attendance average in the club's modern history. Over 8,500 per game, on average. And in fact, after hovering around an average of 5,000 for a few years, Timbers attendance has ticked upwards steadily each year, despite having owners (pre-Paulson) who cared very little about the team and barely advertised or marketed them. There is a hunger for soccer in this town. You see it in the strong attendances for the UP Pilots' men's and women's programs. You saw it in 1997 when a World Cup qualifier between the US and Costa Rica sold out in a few hours, and again during the Women's World Cup matches held here in 2003. You see it in packed bars and even Pioneer Square during the World Cup. Unlike many places in the country, and indeed many cities that already have MLS teams, soccer thrives in Portland. But probably the best indicator for the sport's popularity and ability to draw paying customers is to look at the last few seasons of the Timbers, and specifically, the exhibition matches that drew higher profile opponents, however briefly, to Portland. In 2005, the English side Sunderland came to play the Timbers, drawing over 15,000. Since then, a steady stream of exhibitions has followed each year. Coventry City, AC Milan and Juventus youth squads, Mexican sides Morelia and Tigres, and all of these post significant upticks in attendance compared to the regular season matches they feature alongside. What that says to me is that there is a base of Portland soccer fans that will pay for the product as-is, and there are up to 50-100% more of them that will pay for a much improved product. Bringing MLS here is not just improving that product, but also opening several doors to bring in even better quality exhibitions. I can guarantee you that Merritt will look to maximize his exhibition schedule, and with the step up in talent, he'll stop playing around with the youth squads and second-tier English clubs, and go for the big clubs. Could we then be seeing Manchester United vs. Portland Timbers in the near future? Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves. But renovating the stadium and the already replaced turf (although really, let's put some grass in there if this works out, okay Merritt?) means almost certainly that MLS awards the All-Star Game to Portland within the first year or three after we join the league. The last three opponents in the ASG were Chelsea, Celtic, and West Ham United, all three of which would certainly sell out PGE Park. Then you look at who other MLS teams have been able to bring in as opponents, including Everton, Aston Villa, Real Madrid, Barcelona, and you have to say that if Portland has a higher profile team, there's no reason they can't attract that kind of opponent, especially with Nike and Adidas headquarters here also (recent sightings of Wayne Rooney and Ronaldinho in Portland are directly attributable to the sportswear giants). Then beyond MLS, having a stadium configured for soccer, and a passionate fan base means the US National Team may start look to play friendlies and World Cup qualifiers here again, and the US Women would absolutely follow suit. But let's look beyond the game days and ask, what will MLS do for Portland in the larger picture? What I think it will do is help cement the structure and visibility of soccer in our community, right down to the youngest levels. A few years ago, MLS passed a rule mandating the creation of youth academies attached to each team, and in return, the team gets first signing rights to players developed in those academies if and when they turn pro. A Portland Timbers youth academy would provide a pipeline to the team to build depth while simultaneously giving a path for the best talent we're growing right here in Portland to the MLS and way beyond. I say way beyond because if the Timbers are in MLS, a player has so much more visibility to scouts from the US National team and European clubs. You just have to look at players like Clint Dempsey, Jozy Altidore, Freddy Adu, and Michael Parkhurst to see that MLS has given them platforms to be noticed by much bigger spotlights. Wouldn't we like there to be similarly great opportunities for our kids? And as I write this post my mind keeps flitting back to Brian Libby's words written when the proposal was newly announced:

The point is an investment in athletic facilities, be they with high price tags like Paulsen's or modest ones like Roosevelt High's, is that they're an investment in culture. ... Just as we measure the value of our homes by more than much more than square footage, bedrooms or what it would fetch in the market, so too must we look at each of these proposals as how they would be enjoyed by the community.

We outlay money as a community for things we deem important to our culture: parks, zoos, concert halls, art installations, and yes, stadiums for sports teams. Yes, some of these cultural amenities aren't supported by everyone (as a vegetarian, I'd like to see the Zoo closed yesterday, but the voters have spoken and just gave them a lot more money than Paulson's asking for), but enough people support them and have their lives enriched by them that they're considered worth the cost, even if there's a chance the direct economic costs aren't repaid. Absolutely we should take care of the basics first. But this project takes away nothing from our basic needs and adds a higher profile cultural figure to our community. The cost is incredibly cheap compared to similar projects around the country. The city is well positioned for it, and an opportunity like this is not likely to repeat. Please, Portland City Council, approve the stadium plan and bring MLS to Portland!

100 Points

2008-12-10T17:01:37Z

100 Points from Mike Merrill on Vimeo.

Batum Le Roi: News Round Up

2008-12-04T03:26:15Z

Nicolas Batum news round up! Henry Stern of the Willy Week mentions the Boy Wonder of France in an overview of the great new players on the team:

And on defense, 19-year-old Frenchman Nicolas Batum, along with veteran Travis Outlaw, is an effective long-armed defender when an opponent?s top scorer has the ball in the last minutes of a game.

In an interview with Truth About It, (click that just to see a blazers lolcat) Blazer blogger SJ of ripcityproject.com says:

I like Batum a lot more with that first unit than I do Travis. And while we're on the topic of Batum, his play is making Mr. Outlaw more and more expendable. It's clear that with every game he's improving and his ceiling is much higher than Outlaw's.

Back on the first, the Oregonian reported Coach Nate McMillian saying:

"It's a big step," McMillan said of Batum getting a fourth-quarter call. "But I think what he did gives me confidence. It gives the players confidence, and it gives Nic confidence."

Expectations are rising for the young French Prince of Lisieux! The only bad news is that no one seems to carry a number 88 jersey yet.

2008 Blazers Schedule iCal

2008-12-01T22:52:50Z

The blazers have an iCal download for the 2008 Blazers Schedule.

The Other Things I'm Not Writing About

2008-05-18T19:44:03Z

So this is the place where I'm not writing about the soccer goings-on, and this is the place where I'm not writing about my gardening exploits, and this is the spot where I'm not twittering in-game Timbers updates. And among all those places, I don't have a place where I can not-write about the things that happen to me outside of those worlds: Welcome, Nina. Soon I will begin teaching you the subtle arts of not updating your blogs. And not supporting Chelsea. And chucking your used diapers at the Sounders' bench. And growing spinach.

Merritt Teases, Pleases, and Confirms Our Worst Fears

2008-03-25T14:35:30Z

At one point in the evening, describing the position the Portland Beavers and Portland Timbers were in upon buying the teams, owner Merritt Paulson says "now, I don't want to speak ill of the previous management..." Before he can finish, however, a chorus of "Please do!"s erupt from our table. "Our table" in this case is the de facto Timbers Army table, four of us doing the representing (two hairy, two non, if you must know) at a cozy chat over brews and finger food at the Bridgeport Brewery. To an audience of about 25 people for just under two hours, Merritt took questions with aplomb and grace on everything from MLS, MLB, his Treasury Secretary father, even touching on the Blazers at points, and reminded us just how much of everything the previous owners did wrong. "I don't think absentee sports ownership works," he says, explaining his decision to jump in with both feet and change his zip code to the 972's. Later he will repeat his quote from the Tribune feature, "the community owns the team," and it seems Paulson takes that to heart in just about everything he does for the teams. But enough exposition, you want some updates on the Timbers, right?

The Teasing

- The Timbers are in negotiations to bring two Mexican teams, one English team, and one Spanish team to Portland for exhibitions. Only one of these is confirmed signed and will be announced, the others are in the works. - The entire Timbers defense will return for 2008. This surprised us a bit, and we weren't sure regarding Leonard Griffen (who left to fulfill his contract with the Columbus Crew) whether he meant Leo would return or if it was a forgotten omission. Regardless, Merritt was very bullish on the Timbers roster for '08, and Justin Thompson will be back! - The team has signed an asian international who's scored World Cup goals! One easily found on youtube! And a "young guy," not on the tail end of his career! Touted as the biggest signing in Timbers history, this one set the intertubes ablaze with rank speculation. Did Togo score any goals last time around?

The Pleasing

- Paulson laid a lot of groundwork to set the context for his MLS plan. Merritt has been looking for an MLS opportunity for years. Contrary to what we in the TA suspected, that Paulson bought a baseball team, found out he had a soccer team and got hooked, Merritt painted a picture of having his eyes open for an MLS deal, and then saw the opportunity with Portland. Most specifically, Merritt saw PGE Park as a leg up in having a facility ready as fast as possible for MLS. (It should be also noted that Paulson had very high praise for MLS, calling it the best opportunity in sports right now, and specifically praising the work of Don Garber and Mark Abbott.) - Merritt's MLS economic plan is practically ready, and it "all will be out there in a short amount of time." Paulson stated again that he would pay the MLS expansion fee and associated costs, but is looking to "raise about $100 million" to make it work. Some of this would be for adding the east side stands and converting PGE to a horseshoe instead of its current boomerang layout, and the rest (probably majority) of that would go to building the Beavers a 8-10,000 seat park of their own (which would be upgradeable for MLB, of course). Paulson's group has four or five sites in mind, but didn't want to name specifics for fear of the debate over locations overtaking the discussion at hand. Paulson contrasted this $100 million figure against the cost of a new MLB team and park starting at around $600 million. Merritt was unequivocal in his assessment that Portland is not ready for MLB, and even if it were, Paulson wouldn't really be the guy to do it. He's here for the MLS action. - Many conversations have been happening in all directions between MLS, the City, and Merritt's group. Even though Merritt hasn't been talking to the mayor (it is an election year, after all), he has been very engaged with the city. There shouldn't be much surprise on 4th Ave when the plan finally hits the street. - There are a number of different funding options, and Merritt has been approached by more potential partners than he can conceivably include. This tells me that Portland's business community would get behind the MLS Timbers rather quick. - MLS "may" tolerate sharing PGE Park with the Beavers "for 5 years" or so. I read this as "will tolerate" myself, but that could be wishful thinking. The Trib reporter who quasi-moderated led off with a question about MLS policy requiring "soccer-only stadiums" and Paulson called that "a simplification," going on to explain that the league would most likely work with the teams co-existing on a short-term basis. - PSU Football is very enthusiastic about the plan. The horseshoe configuration helps them as much as it helps the Timbers, and the stadium is a good selling point for recruiting, believe it or not. Increasing the number of 50-yard line seats is gravy for them, and they may be a good ally to have as this plan winds through city hall.

The Confirming of Our Worst Fears

- Jordan and Wicks are gone. Merritt couldn't disclose what we got for them, but did confirm they were gone and that the team was well compensated. I wake up this morning to find that Bob's already on the case. Big props to Merritt for taking our questions.I haven't been this excited about MLS to Portland in a long time, and I put it down to the enthusiasm and organization of Merritt Paulson, . He's incredibly bullish about the league, about Portland, and about the Timbers, and it sounds like he's done his homework and has a plan of action. There's no question that we couldn't have asked for a better owner to lead us into this challenge. All in all, a great night to be a Timbers fan, made even better by returning home to find my 2008 season tickets awaiting me. Mmmmm, the smell of fresh Timbers tickets.....

Soccer Links

2008-03-25T01:17:31Z

Freakonomics links to a post about Applying Economics into Malaysian Football. And an amazing map of the 1969 moon landing transposed onto a soccer field to show how much of the moon was explored.

J League Soccer

2008-03-17T09:00:20Z

J League Soccer from Mike Merrill on Vimeo.

We're Going to Win the (Soccer Blogging) League

2008-03-10T22:39:54Z

Roberto once dished out the goods regularly with large portions over at OregonLive, and things were good. Then he left to concentrate on building The Offside, and things were less good for Timbers fans, but were good for Soccer fans far and wide. And then Roberto stepped aside again, to concentrate on building Open Meadow schools, which didn't concern soccer fans at all, but still sounds pretty cool (and some of those students are probably players and fans themselves, i'd bet). And since Bob left that blog pulpit at the GoryOnion, there's been a vast gulf between the blogging that PDX soccer fans need and the blogging they've been getting. Don't get me wrong, Donald bleeds Timber green and does a fine job at the helm, and talktimbers is still the first source for breaking news, and this blog is... um.... still around, i guess? But Bob wrote with gusto, timeliness, and detail, with a workrate that is and was unmatched. All of which is a long-ish way of throwing double devil-horns and pumping our fists that Timbers Roberto is back where he belongs, enshrining PTFC at the top level of The Offside team blogs, and getting off to a cracking start already. It's almost like he never left! Welcome back, Bob! The Timbers season just got a bit easier to follow.

Competitive Cookies

2008-03-10T21:19:54Z

By Krista Someone blue and furry once said, "Sometimes me think what is love, and then me think love is what last cookie is for. Me give up the last cookie for you." Truer words have never been spoken...unless you are in the midst of an eating competition, in which case you can't give up your last cookie...because then it would be cheating. It had been a long time since Liz and I had covered and eating competition together. A really long time, but boy did it bring back memories. Awesome memories of meatballs and Atlantic City, grilled cheese in Time Square, and corned beef and cabbage in Boston. This weekend found us in yet another location: Denver, Colorado among mountains...of cookies. Chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies to be exact. And there were even more differences. This contest wasn't being photographed by the Associated Press and Badlands Booker and Crazy Legs were nowhere to be found. In their place was a trio of Asian brothers, aged 7 - 15, and the only cameras snapping photos were those attached to family and friends of the contestants. The contest took place at Olde Tyme Drafts and Dawgs and anyone could enter as long as they donated $5 to charity - in this case the charity benefitted was Operation Smile. Liz had been to one of their eating contests before, so thought it would be great if we all went this time and perhaps even got one of our friends to enter. So who to ask, who to ask....well there was really only one choice and that choice was Micah. Micah, who I happen to think is the bees knees, can eat mad quantities of food. He usually finishes all of my meals, meaning once he eats his, he then proceeds to clean my plate as well. I think he may have been a seal in a past life...a seal who couldn't swim...or something like that. Anyway, he wakes up hungry and he goes to bed hungry. This man seems to never feel full. I would think he had Prader-Willi syndrome, but he's never eaten so much he has made his stomach explode, so he does seem to have a handle on it somewhere. So Liz and I somehow talked Micah into entering the contest. I think it had something to do with the words chocolate, chip, and cookie. However, I don't think he expected us to take it as seriously as we did. As soon as Micah agreed, Liz proceeded to contact tons of professional eaters for advice for him. Micah got a little scared, but I assured him on the drive over, we would love him unconditionally if he lost, which funny enough was Tim "Eater X" Janus' advice. I also told him that Liz and I don't do things half-assed. If we are gonna do something, we are gonna DO something. Besides, who would turn down advice from someone at the top of the field? Crazy people that's who! Who wouldn't want to know that Pat Bertoletti, ranked 2nd in the world, thinks you should try to fold the cookie in half like a slice of pizza and suggested bringing warm beverages to dunk the cookies in. Which we totally did. Before we left Liz's place we made two containers of mint tea. Eric "Steakbellie" Livingston also offered advice in the way of "don't over stuff your mouth" and "dunk". Wise words. While we were gearing Micah up for the competition we never thought the competition would include Marco "Mongo" Marquez, currently ranked 20 in the world or Andrew "Skinnyboy" Lane, ranked 35. Eeek. But in they walked. It was terrific to finally meet them, but bad news for Micah. However, we still had faith that our little eater had the guts to give them a run for their money. Other contestants included the three brothers mentioned above, one unnamed man who disappeared quickly after the contest, and a big-boned woman of a certain age, who seemed to enter the contest just to sit quietly at the corner of the table and slowly eat and dunk a few choice cookies. After the tables were set up with one glass of water, one glass of whole milk, and 2 plates containing 20 cookies each, the contest began. Micah came out swinging and nearly ate 10 cookies in no time flat. In fact, he seemed to be keeping pace with Mongo, the front runner. Could this be happening? He was doing everything we told him to: dunking, drinking, not overstuffing his mouth, not rushing too fast at the beginning. Before you knew it, he hit 15! And then we saw it. The pause, the hand to the stomach, and the look of pure agony. It reminded me of the look Joey Chestnut gets late into every contest. The look that seems to say, I can go no further, yet that's what makes Joey a champion. He hits that wall and just charges through, Micah on the other hand, knew it was the end. He wasn't going to push through. It called an end to his brief flirtation with competitive eating. He's not willing or able to push past that internal wall that screams, No Mas! In the end Mongo won with 26.5 cookies, Skinnyboy came in second with 22. Micah came in an impressive 3rd with 15. Micah recovered pretty quickly after a night of laying on his side and watching TV with vows that it would be a long time before he ate another cookie. However, the next day while going into the fridge and grabbing one for me I asked him if he wanted a cookie. His reply: "Yeah, sure." Spoken like a true champion. See Liz's Westword blog post about the competition!

PSU Viks & the EPL?

2008-03-09T23:39:39Z

While watching the Fulham/Blackburn/GoTeamAmerica match on tape delay today, Ryan, Gene and myself noticed something interesting in the crowd of Fulham FC supporters after the match. First, there were the usual members of Roy's Army:

then this woman appeared at Ewood Park:

That looks an awful lot like the Portland State University Vikings logo, as seen here:

Is someone from PSU cheering on our boys in the EPL? Ryan suggested it could be a Kasey Keller relative/fan, but then we agreed they would most likely be sporting a Pilots hat. Hmmm, anyone know the answer to this mystery? Curt Kentner care to investigate?

I Hate the World: Jerseys Edition

2008-01-30T22:26:48Z

Pop quiz, hotshot: what sport are we playing in this monstrosity? yegods, Nike, get a goddamn clue! Read this, please, and go back to the drawing board. And Adidas, what are you doing to the new DC United shirt? where are the iconic stripes? This is my sad face. And I'm not even a DC diehard, i just think they play teh pretty football.

While My Chainsaw Gently Weeps

2008-01-24T23:21:06Z

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew he would hang up the saw and slab for good. But I didn't want to believe that it would be anytime soon. Timber Jim is retiring.

"I have loved celebrating with Timbers community throughout the years,” said Serrill. “Words simply fall short in summarizing my experiences. I have truly been blessed."

No, Jim, it's we who have been blessed. I can't think of anyone who has such enthusiasm for life and his team, and no one more synonymous with the Portland Timbers. You have left behind some sequoia-sized shoes to fill. You'll get your last chance to pay respect and see the man in action at the Timbers' home opener against Puerto Rico on April 17th. Tribute thread on TalkTimbers is here.

Yank Number Five; This Barrell Has A Bottom, Doesn't It?

2008-01-23T18:19:37Z

Yank #5 comes to Fulham: Eddie Johnson's work permit is approved. But more on that in a bit. Gallons of ink has been spilled, by better writing talent than I, about the woes of supporting a terrible team. Teams that try your patience. Teams that fill you with malaise and ennui, yet you still spend too much of the day refreshing news sites and message boards for bits and scraps of hope. Teams mired in relegation battles, constancy found only in the giant sucking sounds they make each game. My English team, Fulham (yes, i stopped denying it to myself, they are my team after the Timbers) has been the embodiment of the team only a mother could love. and only lowly Derby County have kept Fulham from last place. Watching Fulham is already hard enough when they aren't on FSC. I've hauled myself over more than once to the local Frat Guy Sports Haus in the Pearl District because it's the only place i can find a free TV with setanta. If they drop to the colaship, i'll be reduced to listening to poor quality audio streams each week. For which i will probably obsessively make time for. sigh. A few numbers to lend perspective: 13 games without a win. 2 wins in the entire season. 4 wins from the last 40 games. haven't won away since 2006! and just yesterday, went scoreless over 120 minutes, losing on penalties to a team two leagues below! who are in 18th place in that league two levels down! How much farther can the slide go? Lynda and Derek, what was it like last year for West Ham fans? At least you guys had your illegal player to bail you out at the last minute (no, i'm not bitter). What's most infuriating and depressing to me about the situation is how spectacularly Lawrie Sanchez ran the ship against the rocky coastline, resulting in complete demolition. It was a strategy that really had no middle ground, shipping out a fair number of the existing team in order to bring in half the Northern Ireland side (where Sanchez had just managed them to some acclaim) and talent unproven in the Premiership. On top of that, he enforced a truly repugnant style of football that the players were ill-equipped to execute. I can't describe the exasperation i was feeling seeing Bocanegra or Konchesky hoof the ball up once again to absolutely no one because the boss insisted that square passes were a waste of time. Once Brian McBride went down, the gig was up. So now Sanchez is out (a month too late) and Roy Hodgson is in and has had the squad for a number of games, how's that turned out? well, so far not too well. of course, when your first three league games in charge are Chelsea, Arsenal, and West Ham away, you don't expect to rack in the points, but being unable to beat Bristol Rovers over two games has to be a red flag. All i can hope is that Roy wanted the cup out of the way so he could concentrate on the league, and i wouldn't blame him if so. But on the other hand, this team needs a win so badly. ANY win. The squad has completely lost confidance and has no chemistry anymore. The thing is, though, I'm still cautiously optimistic about Hodgson and Fulham: - Before Roy was named, a somewhat usual list of managerial suspects was trotted out by every tabloid. Venables (eh), McClaren (dear god), Hoddle (dunno), Souness (run screaming), etc. The pick of Hodgson quieted some of the bigger fears because of two things: 1) experience at all levels: Blackburn, Inter Milan, Copenhagen, Switzerland, Finland, etc. this was definitely a man who wasn't going to panic because he's never been in a dogfight before. 2) because of that experience, he should have plenty of contacts to find new players in the January window. - Those new signings are starting to come in, and though they're still not Premiership standbys, they show more promise than Sanchez' NI squad. Brede Hangeland is a 6'5" central defender with some size. Height has been completely missing from Fulham's back line. Andreasan should go a lot towards filling the gaping hole in midfield left by the departure of Papa Bouba Diop, and to a lesser extent, Luis Boa Morte. Why Sanchez thought Steven Davis and Danny Murphy could replace them is beyond me. - which brings me back to Eddie Johnson. Eddie is the sort of player that's always infuriated me, much in the same way that Landon Donovan does. He's obviously talented and faster than all get-out, but he's traditionally played with a sense of entitlement because of his past exploits, and mentally takes himself out of games. I've never seen him in the McBride/Dempsey mold of battling hopelessly for 90 minutes, and that's actually what Fulham need a few tons of right now. BUT, the other side of it is that he's faster and more of a goal poacher than anyone else at Fulham save McBride, who is probably still a month away from being back and match fit. Also, i think that partly what Landon and Eddie both have needed was a kick in the shorts from someone who really knows the game and knows how to develop young players with loads of potential upside. If Roy can provide that for Eddie, good things can and will happen. - and finally, the single biggest thing that gives me hope is this: the league has spread the suck around. Usually, there's a handful of clubs that prop up the rest of the table, and the relegation fight is fairly limited. This year, slots #13-19 are separated by just 7 points! any two of Bolton, Middlesboro, Wigan, Sunderland, Birmingham, Reading and Fulham can conceivably join Derby in going down. Rather than being a foregone conclusion, it's a mad scramble for points. Which makes next Tuesday's fixture at Bolton so much more important. It's an absolutely must-win game for Fulham, and just happens to be the first game that Hodgson's signings can get in. Bolton have just sold Anelka to the zombie army (terrible decision from Bolton's view if you ask me... where are their goals going to come from now? but i suppose you don't just turn down £15 million lightly), so there's nothing forgone about the fixture, 6 points are at stake. Here's hoping Eddie can score the game-winner in his debut! (Bolton v. Fulham is on FSC Tuesday the 29th at 3pm Pacific time.)

And the Angels Sang Hosannas

2008-01-11T17:59:16Z

from today's Trib:

• Finally, PGE Park is getting a new artificial surface. The plan is to begin tearing out the old NeXturf today, with a new FieldTurf surface expected to be in place by mid-February – in time for the Oregon State-Georgia three-game baseball series beginning Feb. 29. It’s a $1.1 million project that will benefit the Portland Beavers and Timbers, Portland State and the local high schools to no end.

The turf at piggy has been one of the single greatest obstacles to getting better soccer in Portland. No big teams will come to play on it, players think twice about signing for the Timbers because of it, and the terrible lack of absorbtion means games look like a ragged game of net-less volleyball. While grass is obviously every Timbers fans' first choice, almost anything is better than that peach fuzz crap that's there now. On another note, I've been on record before about idiotic team names in MLS, and if you've prompted me "IRL", as the kiddos say, you've probably regretted asking my opinion of said names (short version: Burn, Mutiny, and Wiz are just as terrible as Real Salt Lake). But Emerald City Greens?! Are you fucking kidding me? I still can't stop laughing. Please please please don't be a rumor. Couldn't happen to a more deserving city!