Movies and The Internet--SNEAKERS

SNEAKERS, released in 1992, features an "all-star cast" of Robert Redford, Sidney Poitier, my old John Sayles buddy David Strathairn, Dan Aykroyd, a pre-death River Phoenix, Mary McDonnell (another Sayles alum), Ben Kingsley, Donal Logue, and a final cameo by Darth Vader. Pretty cool lineup, right? Pretty lame movie...

It covers the same surveillance territory that FF Coppola tackled in 1974's THE CONVERSATION, only with more updated, computer technology. I became immediately skeptical of this film the second they tried to make me think this rag-tag bunch would be capable of infiltrating high-level security.

Aykroyd is annoying as ever as "Mother", full of tired conspiracy theories. Strathairn's "Whistler" gets a few comedic turns as a blind man whose hearing is so acute he can detect the slightest change in audio levels, etc. Also, he gets to read braille Playboys and drive a van. Phoenix doesn't do much except be a pretty boy charmer, and Poitier almost saves himself with a good one-liner at the end. Redford carries the film for the most part, but can't do much to save the boring, implausible script, which basically involves the group stealing a high-tech espionage device, then having to re-steal it. HIJINKS!!!

Let's look at some photos:

Here is the braille Playboy--perhaps the joke is that old saying that guys like the magazine for the articles.

This is the guy they have to steal the device from initially, and yep, it's Donal Logue, AKA Jimmy the Cab Driver. I bet he'd like to forget how lame he looks as a nerd in this film.

Ha Ha! The blind man dances funny! Ugh.

More blind jokes--look, "Whistler" is hacking in the dark.

At least he is able to decode this mess.

Obligatory license plate enhancement shot:

The film takes an amazingly dark turn for a second when Poitier's character "Crease" lets loose on some bad guys with the line "Motherfuckers mess with me, I'll split your head!" WHOA.

James Earl Jones shows up at the end to provide some unneeded comic relief, granting blackmail wishes to the crew.

Finally, Redford looks like he is just as glad as I am that this film is over with.