Urban Honking

Hello! In looking at the last piece of advice I posted it occurs to me that perhaps it is not always useful to be extremely long-winded–something I have obviously struggled with my whole life. Thus, I would like to suggest that future advice-seekers feel free to specify if they would like a long rambling discourse […]

Hello Ms. Regarding, Lately I find myself feeling really negative about a certain thing that I cannot quite name. It is not quite “novelty,” and only kinda sorta “frivolity.” Basically it is this: I will receive an email or a message on an online network about something I consider to be quite stupid, like moshing […]

  When the land feels too large I head to the orchard.  Yes, the orchard is four times the size of my vegetable plot.  But the trees are countable.  The nectarines end and apricots begin.  The apricots end where the figs start.  The small section of figs presses against the peaches.  In the orchard I […]

As the planet keeps spinning, as my body keeps falling apart into stiff and wizened decrepitude, as the ice caps keep melting, as children keep growing up oh so fast and then dying horribly just like everybody else, as this smoothie keeps looking too much like barf for me to seriously consider drinking it, as […]

Though my vegetable field is only an acre, the land can feel vast and uncomfortably large.  The mountain range in the west (whose name nobody seems to know) sits far in the distance from my small plot and on summer days the dust and pesticides and smog smudge my clear view of the hills.  The […]

Josh’s health is improving daily. Many challenges and months of recovery ahead of him, but making beautiful progress. For info, to help out, to keep updated on new stuff and photos: www.getwelljosh.com Thanks, everybody, for the amazing support you’ve shown, and the good wishes and prayers and fabulous vibes from all over the world. They […]

Sometimes a man will tell his bartender things that he’ll never tell his doctor. Dr. Boyce, Star Trek Pilot Hello, my name is Tyler, and welcome to the Captain’s Log. We are a blog dedicated to the enjoyment of wine! Through this open forum, I will be recounting my trials and tribulations dealing with one […]

“Honk If You Approve Of Massive Government Subsidies For The Disgustingly Rich, Oh Sorry I Forgot You Can’t Afford A Car” quoting myself. My short-lived idea for starting a bumper sticker company. I also like “I’m a racist caricature and I vote.” You know Keep Portland Weird, obviously? Now the backlash has begun. I have […]

Not to be all dewy-eyed about bullshit car culture, but this is a pretty badass car am I right? The person currently watching all my parents’ stuff (and driving their car) took this photo. This is our historical family car, which is some sort of 1985 GMC suburban. It is basically the biggest civilian car […]

Joshua Berger, art director of Plazm magazine, was in a bike accident in Portland eleven days ago. He has been in trauma wards at hospital ever since, and is making steady improvements. However, he has sustained considerable Traumatic Brain Injuries (TBI) that will likely take months of recovery. Perhaps years. Please keep Josh and our […]