Comments on: Where’s My Elephant

By: dalas v

dalas v — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 09:01:31 +0000

“have passed through Baby Fever and now am just exhausted/vaguely grossed out by whole concept of babies”

Same here. It’s weird to feel yourself choose to be a minority, and know that you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of most people feeling vaguely sorry for you or something. I really do not want any kids, though! And since my wife is even more passionate about not having them than I am, it’s pretty much case closed.

T.S., KIDS!

By: geneviève

geneviève — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 17:31:19 +0000

I guess I am not thirty-four yet, but well on my way.
What is difficult for me when you speak of your aging body is that I know you and from my perspective you have great genes and a lot of youth left. You talk of your saggy ass and I can’t help but be “OMG, she has NO idea!”. Some of us start with saggy asses at the age of eleven. As much as I deeply love you, it’s too much to take sometimes.
I don’t feel old. I feel like I am aging, but I am really into it. To me it’s a beautiful thing. So many things I used to care about are now no big deal. I felt frumpy as a twenty year-old and now as a thirty year-old I have moments where I am like “Hey… I’m doing all right.”. I just don’t feel like talking with friends about how old we are getting all the way up to fifty and then after fifty just being old.
Some of my friends are in their late forties and when I hang out with them I am not scared. There is still so much life to live, so much stuff to do, so many new friends to make. It’s not all about joint pain and going to bed early. This could very likely be a phase of your life, you know? Like maybe in a not so distant future you’ll have a job and life that will make you attend fancy events where you have to dress pretty and stay up late.
I love you.
Happy birthday!

By: h heckler

h heckler — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 18:29:06 +0000

I am 34 and also a bit stuck on the topic of age, death, and deterioration. This is because (though I am still pretty youthful) I kind of feel like shit half the time. And I also can’t stay up late, drink, or ride in cars (without the proper balance of food/water/sleep beforehand). I don’t like it, but that’s the way it is.

It is hard for me to take a man’s criticism of age-talk seriously because he is not living with these crazy fucking hormonal changes that feel a lot like your body is either begging you to have a child or punishing you if you decide not to. This shit is real! It’s like I’m waiting for a fever to break.

I also think that being 34 makes me feel like I’m really close to aging out of the job market and that I’d better get my shit together soon if I ever want to do anything interesting in my life (for money). Hopefully I am wrong about this.

Anyway, this is a very long way of saying: please don’t stop writing about your weird feelings about getting old! I’d much rather hear it from someone real like yourself than from a ladies mag trying to sell “age-defying cream,” or whatever.

By: Yours Truly

Yours Truly — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 18:03:31 +0000

amazing! THANK YOU!

By: watzek rocks

watzek rocks — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 17:57:13 +0000

call this number on Monday (503) 768-7341 and ask for Nikki. The library can set your page up for you. It is a service that the library offers.

By: Yours Truly

Yours Truly — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 00:37:06 +0000

it’s really true. RCH is full of pithy gems!

By: Jessica Hopper

Jessica Hopper — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 23:57:17 +0000

“puberty took my youth away” is the great comment in the history of comments.

By: rch

rch — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 20:36:57 +0000

I have never been too hung up on my youth… it never has seemed that great to me, for I have not been clear-skinned and high-breasted for many days. Puberty took *my* youth away. At the same time, as all the little things I take for granted do fall away one by one, I am forced to appreciate what is indeed my youth. My conscience feels heavier and heavier, but it’s because I just started to notice it, too.

For the past couple of years, my focus has shifted away from my peers to what I understand to be my role models–lovely, elegant, adult ladies who have traded in naturally smoothed-down hair for artful beauty and style. I guess it goes to show you that I am hung up on beauty somehow, but I guess I favor cultivated growth over raw, natural materials.

Wonder how I’ll feel in five years…

By: Yours Truly

Yours Truly — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 19:32:02 +0000

one year premature!

but, your points are very good. Also it is silly to spend too much time in actual youth pondering aging, because you know once you’re legitimately old you’ll be like “why did I think I was so old when I was 34? What an asshole.” It’s just hard for me because I am so interested in it, and because my personality is all about superstitiously warding things off by focusing on the very outcomes I most dread.

I can stay up late!!!!!!!

By: Steve

Steve — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 19:27:36 +0000

Ha ha!
I was reading it thinking “i hate that she is doing this again,” and then you wrote about how I hate it! Disarming me!

BUT BUT BUT to constantly focus on the difference in ages and how far away from BEAUTIFUL YOUTH you are creates a false binary of young/old, beauty/ugly, fun/boring, able/disable. It’s just not true at all. The differences are actually really SUBTLE. Sure there are slight changes, and I certainly accept you noticing them and talking about them is positive and funny, but to make it a constant refrain (and the no. 1 topic) must push your feelings and activities towards the negative side of the false binary (a belief that you are no longer beautiful, a belief that you can no longer have fun/do fun things) when in fact you specifically are so shockingly young and fresh in appearance and I can attest to your ability to conquer technologies, stay up late, do physical tasks.
I strongly believe this. Aging is real, its happening, but certainly not to the extent that you claim.
Also, don’t use your age as a crutch!
The US census definition of middle age is 35-50. Your obsession is premature.