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Who you calling a Genius?
by acdickson
Okay, bite my tongue. My last post was about the merits of Apple Computers. The sleek design, usability, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Well a retraction of sorts is order, because AC has just returned from the so called Genius Bar at the Los Angeles Grove Mall and he's not happy. First off, the name. Genius Bar? Really, like there are enough geniuses in this country willing to work retail to stock an entire bar of customer service representatives much less to fill one in every major city?
Yeah, AC gets it. Calling it the Genius bar is good marketing, but that still doesn't make him feel any less dumb when the door greeter asks him how he can help and AC feels compelled to answer, "I'm cool, I'm just going upstairs. I have an appointment at the Genius bar."
So I get up there. I mosey over to the wood bench, wait my turn, and saunter up to the genius who calls "AC." My question? PowerPoint has been sluggish ever since I upgraded to Microsoft Office 2004 for Mac (remember that last bit, for MAC). I'm hoping for a suggestions about to get it acting snappy again. I lay it on the Genius. No can do. Seems that since PowerPoint is a Microsoft product, the Geniuses aren't allowed to talk about it. At all. Nope, they can't even hazard a guess. Conversation over. Next.
Wow.
So, what? You think I'm going to sue you for giving me less than perfect advice after making a freaking appointment and driving 45 minutes through LA traffic to get there? Like if you can't fix it I'm going to call the cops on your ass, or dial up MENSA and get then to take your genius certificate away? A little help here, Genius.
Yeah, see that's the problem. Don't call yourself a genius when you're not allowed to answer questions about products you FREAKING SELL IN YOUR STORE. Have you been to an Apple store? There are like 19 different products. You can buy the same crap upstairs as you can downstairs. They just make the stores two stories to fit all the not nearly Genius employees in there. And you're telling me you won't discuss one of those very few products because a rival company who you have working relationship with makes it for you? This is the one product that anyone who writes anything is going to use one a daily basis? A product, I may remind you, that says MAC on the g damn box.
Man, what a scam. I'm sure if you're having problems figuring our your Nano iPod you're going to have one hell of lucky day at the Genius bar. They'll show you how to turn in on, load up some music, AND turn up the volume. But AC has to quote Mr. D here, "Don't Believe the Hype." Love the product, hate the service.
And that dude with the wireless mic aping the AC style with his seminar presentation for four people in that sorry ass amphitheater? Stop embarrassing yourself.
Comments
dude
you are NOT alone
the people that work in apple stores make me want to kill them by choking on the stupid products they know nothing about
seriously
i got in a fight with the 24 year old jock manager of the apple store at pio place
i'll tell you the whole story some time. perhaps over beer or whiskey or pain killers. it makes me that sad
makes me sad about apples
for real
makes me want to build my own linux laptop
fuck
love
adam
Posted by: adam Forkner at January 26, 2006 5:02 PM
hey andrew, i feel dude. makes the guy on top of the building shooting everyone below relatable right!?!! now, you spoke of the positive attributes of having an ebay store. have you found that there are hidden costs ? thanks for always the great insight. honey
Posted by: Honey Owens at January 27, 2006 12:34 AM
You know your a genius when you go to the bar and they refuse to serve you. You would think that one of the three people standing behind the counter could have helped me sooner. I did like seeing my name up on the screen before they called me up to replace my second broken shuffle. I do enjoy the fact that they replaced 2 of those things for me no questions asked.
The bar is pretty at least and it's a good place to meet cute, smart girls.
Posted by: Drew Anderson at June 30, 2006 12:33 AM
You know your a genius when you go to the bar and they refuse to serve you. You would think that one of the three people standing behind the counter could have helped me sooner. I did like seeing my name up on the screen before they called me up to replace my second broken shuffle. I do enjoy the fact that they replaced 2 of those things for me no questions asked.
The bar is pretty at least and it's a good place to meet cute, smart girls.
Posted by: Drew Anderson at June 30, 2006 12:33 AM
AC, I think you should switch to Keynote! It's fun, and the best presenter in the world, Steve Jobs, built it. :)
Posted by: Mikey at January 26, 2006 10:23 AM