and then my teeth fell out

I dreamt that I was the groom marrying Willow. The wedding took place in a furniture store. I was a skinny blonde man. I was pretty pumped. Then suddenly I was me, the bride, marrying this skinny blonde man in a furniture store, and I looked around, and I was like, "OK, I can do this." But then I realized that my parents weren't there, and I got so sad. I had been too busy to invite anyone, including my mom and dad, and then I was like, "I don't even know the guy I'm marrying! I don't want to do this!"

Nothing is more interesting than reading/hearing about other people's dreams, right? Heh, heh, hmm.

I think it's time for me to start building a crush pyramid. I already have some candidates, including my former (and future) landlord, the man who owns the record store next door to my coffee shop, and a Hot Dad at school. (He's divorced.) I think record shop man is at the top of the pyramid right now. According to the ladies in attendance at Sunday's "Ladies Cocktail Party," he is a catch. Here are some facts about him, according to the drunk girls:
* "He's single!"
* "He's like, the nicest guy."
* "He's a business owner!"
* "He totally has his shit together!"
* "You should totally ask him on a date."

So... yeah. High praise. I'm trying hard to avoid the rebound stuff and preserve my fragile relationship karma, so I don't think I will ask anyone out on any dates anytime soon. But it's good to consider the options, right? Make a graph? There are a couple of other dudes I could probably work into the pyramid, but you know. Don't want to give it all away on the internet.

I actually made myself a halfway promise that I'm not going to make any first moves. Boys are such wimps, I always end up asking a man out or going for a kiss or whatever. But I have been burned! And not just this one time! Mark my words: The next man I fall for will be one who has pursued me strongly. I'm not going to make it easy on anyone. Fuck that. I can smile and make small talk until the cows come home- I ain't sweating it. Leave the heavy lifting to the tough guys. I've got a pyramid to build anyway. (Which I guess involves heavy lifting. Whatever. I'm just talking tough. Like a tough guy. Dammit!) All of this is just a way of saying I probably won't date for a while. Take that, creeps!

Sigh.

I'm going to go take a shower.