Right now I am sitting

Right now I am sitting on the floor of the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport, wedged in between the Verizon pre-paid phone card machine and a carousel of pay phones. Its the only place I can find an outlet. An announcement just came on: "the current threat advisory, as determined by the Homeland Security Agency is: Orange."

This recording is apparently played every five minutes, because... why? Because I need an up-to-the-minute update on how much personal danger I am in as an air traveller? Because knowing that it is orange instead of red or magenta or teal, will cause me to behave much differently as i go about the business of being an air travller? Because it will reassure me and act to promote a sense of public calm and unity? Probably not. But whatetever the explanation, for some reason right now it strikes me as kind of festive. Orange. The color of holidays in America.

What is calming, though, is the fact that I was given the wrong boarding pass. They just called me up to the gate to give me one, but strangely, they had given me one when i checked in. I didn't think to look at the name on it, a testament to my blind faith in the well-oiled cogs of the airline processing system, but maybe I should of. Instead of Garlich, Fiona it was something like Rekyviska, Treminska. (Not really recognizable as a name, so I don't feel that bad).

It is funny, though, that even though you are in the computer, they will refuse to let you on the flight if you loose your boarding pass somewhere between the luggage search, the multiple checkpoints, and the shoe-removal pavillion. And yet somebody handed me somebody else's boarding pass. I hope Mr. or Ms. Rekyviska made it to Cincinatti ok.

Yes, that would be Cincinatti, Ohio. Not many people know that Cincinatti is actually located on the direct route to Portland, OR from the Twin Cities. Oh wait, its not. Just goes to show that when you say that you are going to buy your plane tickets early this year and not procrastinate like you do every other year, you should actually try to do that. Back in Portland, now, I can say that it is very satisfying to take a 2 hour flight in the wrong direction and then literally fly over your original departure city on the way back. Very satisfying. Especially when you consider that your plane tickets were not at all cheap, and that you dropped over $400 for the priviledge. I did learn, though, that Cincinatti, OH is suprisingly close to Kentucky. And yet some consider Ohio to still be the midwest. I think not.
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