Mikey: November 2005 Archives

There are many mustache competitions that happen in the world, under varying rules and schedules, but other than the World Beard and Mustache competition, the only important competition is the one you or your friends are participating in. The following is designed as a both a document of our contest and a guide to help other "growers" recruit and run their own competition. We wish everyone a thick and bushy stache!

The Competitors

Before we got started, we took some pictures of what people normally look like. Most of our growers avoided facial hair, only occasionally growing a beard or goatee, and none had previously ever had just a mustache.

The Rules

We used rules modified from the Vanderbilt University Mustache Relief:

• All facial hair will be removed (this includes, but is not limited to mustaches, beards, goatees, muttonchops, chinstraps, John Waters pencil thins, soul patches, sideburns that extend below the earlobe, and Van Dykes).
• For the duration of five weeks the sweet mustaches will be grown for the world to behold. There will be weekly Mustache Checkpoint Days.
• No Hitler Mustaches allowed. (The Charlie Chaplin is permissible, but be careful, it’s a fine line!)
• The use of performance enhancing hormones or coloring agents is forbidden.
• Though the Mustache Checkpoints are not mandatory (we believe in the honor system) they are a great opportunity to encourage your Mustache brothers-in-arms during the growing season.
• While we do not endorse trash-talking or making disparaging comments of any kind about another grower’s ‘Stache, there are unsubstantiated medical theories that Mustache Abuse stimulates follicle growth.

The rules were originally much stricter, but were relaxed when some growers complained. The goal here is make the competition fun but still somewhat challenging. Some people will drop out, and that is okay, because there is honor in recognizing that you were not meant to be a mustachioed man.

The Shaving

A shaving ritual is a nice way to build camaraderie among the growers:

Freshly Shorn

Not everyone can meet every week, and while we did request a photo be sent if a grower couldn't make a meeting, it was more a request than grounds for dismissal.

(top: ian, cabel, mike. bottom: steve, j.john, noby)

Sending pictures also allowed for foreign growers to participate. But remember, shaving is not always a pleasant experience:

Week 1

Finally the first meeting! We met up at the Horse Brass for pints of Guinness and to play the Celebrity Mustache Quiz.

Steven was kind enough to join us, even though he did shave after the weekend when he realized his week of facial growth made him look much too creepy. We raised our drinks to the mustache that never was, and also to being one step closer to victory!

Week 2

We invited both growers and friends and supporters of growers to Huber's for flaming spanish coffee and turkey dinner.

(left to right, top to bottom: josh, tim, cabel, j.john, willow, dave, mike, steve, nicole, les, wade, rebecca)

Stay tuned for Part 2, covering weeks 3 and 4, and then Part 3 covering week 5 and the final judging!

This is possibly the very first URBAN HONKING related project. It was almost 2001 and the streets were cold and the parks were wet and dismal. Make something out of nothing. Make movement when bones are frozen. Make tricks out off anything and everything. Join Steve "Pauly" Schroeder, Mike Merrill, and Jona Bechtolt for a trip both back in time and into your own mind. GET WITH IT.

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