September 2007 Archives
So our Ultimate Blogger 3 response to the "Participation" challenge did not go over well. So much so that we almost got voted off despite there being one team who didn't post anything. I guess there aren't many NeverEnding Story fans on the other teams. Our next post is up, a response to the "Passion" challenge. I think there's a strong possibility we'll be leaving the competition shortly, so get your hot, fresh team Oh Don Piano while you can.
But let's put blogging competitions aside for a moment, because elimination or not, today's a much more special day.
Two years ago today, my bridesmaids and I were spread out in a nail shop getting our toes and fingers prettied up for the evening and Willow was being drooled over by a gaggle of Korean women who were dying to wax her legs. In a few more hours, I would be sitting in a tiny salon on the lower east side with Mario carefully styling my hair into shiny curls, working so deliberately that my mom and I would worry we were running late. An hour or so after that, I would be in a hotel room in Brooklyn with my girls, getting dressed and letting Kelly apply my makeup. There would be a videographer there taping everything as a gift to us, even though she would later abandon the project and that footage would be lost to history.
Some time later, we would pile into a limo. Though we had just reserved something small to carry the 6 or so of us, the company sent over a gigantic SUV-type stretch limo--a ridiculous vehicle under any circumstances. We would laugh about it and then pour a little champagne for each of us to sip on our way to Prospect Park.
We would arrive at the park early for pictures. Some people were disappointed that J and I would see each other before the ceremony, but there was no other practical way to do the pictures. We would tromp all over the park taking serious pictures and goofy pictures, before I would be ushered back to the limo to wait.
My girls and I would end up sitting in that limo for awhile before the ceremony would start. The windows were tinted, but people peeked over, and we watched them all file into the picnic house. It was almost sunset.
Then I would be walking down the aisle in the last moments that J and I wouldn't just be fiances anymore (though neither of us cared for that word much, or used it very often).
Things would go wrong: a friend of the family would come late, the officiant would break into a speech about Hurricane Katrina, the caterer would make my mom mad, the room wouldn't be arranged the way we had planned, the DJ would mess up the father/daughter/mother/son song, the cars we'd arranged to get people out of the park wouldn't be able to enter the park, J and I would steal someone's cab on Prospect Park West in order to get to our hotel, my parents would ride out in a Penske truck with some park staff.
Things would go very right: the red velvet cupcakes made by Abby would be devoured with eyes rolled in ecstasy, my friends would perform a surprise choreographed dance, people who asked if it was okay that they not give a toast would give heartfelt and teary toasts, J and I would end the night eating the best room-service grilled cheese and french fries we'd ever had while collapsed on a bed watching the end of Saturday Night Live.
Lucky for us, things would continue to go right for the next two years.
Happy anniversary, J.
Happy late ANTM day, everybody! I hope Tyra and the Jay's brought much happiness and laughter to your hearts and homes.
I'm exhausted. All the time. We completed our second Ultimate Blogger 3 challenge last weekend and posted it late Tuesday night. We didn't win immunity, but I have a feeling we'll be okay for this round, since one participant didn't even post.. You should check it out. There's a quiz on blogs at the end there, and if you fancy yourself a blog-nerd, you could win a prize. I have faith that your blog knowledge is vast (also I'd really rather award a prize than have to admit we created an unwinnable quiz). Win it, people!
As part of helping out another team, we created a blog post on paper. I think that's the best thing I have for you right now. I know, this blogging competition is hindering my blogging! The irony!
As promised, here is our answer to the first Ultimate Blogger 3 challenge. For the first challenge, we were supposed to create a profile of our team and this is what we came up with. Let me tell you that it was hi-larious at midnight as we were putting the finishing touches on it. I, uh, hope it holds up in the daylight. A healthy appreciation of bad television will make it that much more funny for you.
There are some other profiles up now and the rest will continue to go up throughout the day. (So far, we're partial to the fancy blogging machine.) All the contestants vote later today on the first team to be eliminated. Check us out, and if you feel so inclined, say something nice in the comments to counterbalance the first commenter, who dismissed us as a snoozefest. Look, we know it's a reality show and we're not here to make friends (damn, I've always wanted to say that!), but we weren't expecting "boring" right out of the gate.
Anyway, that's how much I love you, internet: I will allow myself to be filmed with a mouthful of hot dogs.
Yo! I have been gone a long time! I know you missed me because you all sent me emails making sure I wasn't dead, so that's sweet. Shall we talk about the absence? There was no real reason for the absence. Things at work got very busy, things I had to post to the web and tell the world about seemed very minimal. So much so on either side that I contemplated abandoning the whole thing. For real! I know this is now the second time I've threatened such an exit from the internets, but probably one day I'll have the follow through to give it up for good. It will probably be around the same time I give up reality television, or stop thinking imitations of Britney's wounded puppydog dance on the VMAs are hilarious.
Anyway, I have been up to lots. Mostly competitive things like pub quizzes and video scavenger hunts. Our pub quiz team, Oh Don Piano, is tragically stuck in a tied-for-third ranking, but we're hoping to revitalize our standings tonight (we'll be using a new name for the evening: Two Drunk Frootloops and a Hungry Stripper...I don't see how that doesn't spell W-I-N-N-E-R-S right there, honestly*).
Video scavenger hunts are fun, though we learned strangers will not typically let you A) hold their babies or B) clean their living rooms, even if you are female and unassuming looking and have the video scavenger hunt list and video camera. They will, however, let you challenge them to eating competitions. Since I was wearing my IFOCE shirt at the time, I saw it only fitting that I partake in my first official ("official") eating competition. I lost miserably when my opponent finished his sample bag of granola before I did (that shit is moisture-suckingly dry), though I did better and won the rematch with a sample container of applesauce. I know! Joey better watch it.
Speaking of Joey watching it, I took advantage of some killer airline sales and bought a ticket to go to the Krystal Square Off finals in Chattanooga at the end of next month. I have never been to the south before and I'm a little afraid of what they do to vegetarians down there. I'm mostly excited about a little two hour road trip I get from Nashville to Chattanooga and the fact that Willow and Mike might meet me down there. I know, can you believe the seriousness of the party that will ensue? I sure wish I knew a southern blogger who loved Krystals who could come visit me while I was there...
And the real reason for the return to the internet is: I am participating in the Ultimate Blogger 3 competition. If the irony of me coming back from a month's blogging hiatus to compete in a challenge where my team hopes to be crowned some sort of "best blogger" doesn't slay you, then maybe our outrageous and dynamic entries will. We have to post a response to our first challenge by Wednesday, so I'll put up a link when it's there. There's no voting on your part, unfortunately, but you can read our entries anyway and then get totally indignant on our behalves when we eventually get the boot. Or if we win, we can all glory in the spoils together.
See, I missed you and you knew it all along! Let's go out for some pie and catch up.
*...aaaand we placed 3rd.