Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?

I would have thought my croquet skills would have been about average. I'm a decent mini-golfer and, dude, I totally hit par on Wii golfing. But no, I just suck. It didn't help that I was doing okay at the beginning and then kept getting knocked out of the way by faster balls or poison balls, or that the grass was a little long, or that it was getting dark. I was so far behind everyone that they kept forgetting I was still playing. They were all clustered around the final two wickets debating who had the better shot and I was all back three wickets feebly tapping my ball only to watch it slowly advance two inches. I was all, "Hey guys, it's my turn!" and they would turn patiently and watch me, but it was like they were busy swimming laps and I was in the shallow end making them stop and look at my cute orange floaters.

I spent the weekend alternately eating, watching excellent Memorial Day movies on television (Kill Bill, vol. 1 and 2), drinking, and watching some more television (Run's House marathon). J and I went out to dinner one night and on the way back "Stayin' Alive" came on the radio and we cracked ourselves up watching people walk around and imagining they were strutting to the song. It worked particularly well with men in wifebeaters.

Because I'm a super sucker for free stuff, I'd signed up a long time ago for a 7UP challenge to be mailed to me. They send you a can of 7UP, a can of Sierra Mist, and a can of Sprite, and instruct you how to conduct your own blind taste test. This is exactly the kind of thing that appeals to me, y'know. Free stuff, meaningless challenges, testing people.

So we rigged up a screen and some A, B, and C tags and switched off testing each other and then my parents. Let me tell you one thing: these sodas taste almost exactly the same. We got the diet versions, so maybe that has something to do with it, but no one had a clear, distinct favorite, and everyone sipped the samples numerous times trying to figure out if one had a more punchy lemon lime taste. In the end, J and I both went for the Sierra Mist and my parents both went for the Sprite. I realized 7UP didn't include any sort of "report back to us with results!" and this was probably why. With all of them tasting nearly identical, I guess the best they could hope for was a 33% figure.

The weather here has been rediculous. I woke up to shining blue skies and a warm breeze and by the afternoon, it was like the 7th plague out there.

Come save me soon, because I don't want to be around for the locusts. (Unless it's this kind of Locust and it's in Tempe, in which case: bring it, Rich!)