With J’s iPod gone, we

With J’s iPod gone, we listened to a lot of NPR this weekend. For some reason it seemed really tedious to pull out and switch CDs around, and so much easier to just have the radio on. This lack of pop music seemed to make me more susceptible than usual to getting random and annoying songs stuck in my head for way too long. Here’s a sampling of what you would have heard if you’d entered my brain at any given moment over the weekend:

Team America theme, which morphed into
Wayne’s World theme
Gays in Space them, as sung by Maya Rudolph on SNL
“La donna e mobile,” as played by my cell phone
“Oh Industry,” as sung by Bette Midler in Beaches

I know. I KNOW. Pure torture. Plus, it’s hard to get away with muttering, “America…fuck yeah! America…gonna save the motherfuckin’ day, yeah!” under your breath as you shop for groceries.

On the plus side, my hair is major fashion. The new guy did a great job and there is no mom hair or Rachel hair in sight. Right before he got to blow drying, we had a brief discussion about whether I wanted to leave it wavy or get a blow out. Even though it was really humid and rain was imminent, I decided to have him blow it out anyway, because there is nothing better than the feeling of salon blown out hair swishing around your head. Immediately following the conversation, there was a paralyzing moment where I thought, “Did I just say ‘blow job’ instead of ‘blow out?’” I watched the hair guy for any sign that I might have just requested a blow job, but there was none. In fact, I’m almost 100% positive I didn’t say anything crass, but did that stop me from obsessing over it the whole weekend? No, it did not. In fact add “Blow out, blow job, blow out, blow job” to that list up there. My brain’s a regular party.

I did what all you said to do and watched “Hell’s Kitchen” last night. Now I don’t know if I just have less patience for summer reality TV or if I’m out of the loop from missing the first one, but: eh. J and I discussed the possible reasons we felt eh and came up with:

Unlike “American Idol” type shows, where you personally can judge the talent, on HK, you can’t actually taste the food and participate in the active judging, which is part of what’s fun about those shows. Although, I will admit that I liked when the lady threw up and when Chef Chef! declared the steak with peaches “Fucking disgusting.”

Along the same lines, although Chef Chef! is mean like Simon Cowell, I usually end up agreeing with Simon, which validates my opinion and makes me like him as a no-nonsense judge. Again, I’m not sure Chef Chef!’s meanness is something I relate to. Although, obviously that guy Jeff has some Issues.

Finally, I was really stressed out during the Supermarket Sweep portion. What does that part have to do with being good chefs? The whole time I felt like shouting, “Go for the hams!” Okay, I totally shouted that.

I’m not convinced, but I’m not altogether discouraged to give it another shot.

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