I had to get another

I had to get another entry up to get the Pope off the top of my page. And for all you who still don’t get the joke, please put “Citizen Kane” on your Netflix queue. Seriously, I’m embarrassed for you. Remember two entries ago when I saw “Flashdance” and understood the Paula Abdul video 10 years too late? Don’t let this happen to you. Actually, don’t you think you could build a whole college course around researching the sources of all the social and historical commentary on say, “The Simpsons?” The reward of the class would not only be that you would be very well educated, but also very amused.

My friends are throwing a giant dance party this weekend with prizes for such things as “Dirtiest Dancer” and “Best Choreographed Dance.” I think this is great, but have been too busy this week to work on a proper routine (you’d think all the watching of the dance movies would have prompted some spontaneous attainment of dancing skills, but sadly: no). But last night I got a sneak preview of the trophies and, lo, they are fabulous. Engraved. With things like Championship Dance Party 2005 Dirtiest Dancer. And then? As if I didn’t already want a trophy? They also purchased the dreaded green Participant ribbons. You remember those from grade school field day, don’t you? The “Nice try, loser, here’s a scrap of cheap fabric that I know you’ll treasure because you are loser and don’t even know the value of grand things like trophies or blue ribbons” ribbon.

We’re also working on snacks with hilarious punny names. Like, Fred and Ginger Snaps, Dirty Dancing Martinis, Foot Loose Babaganoush with Move Your Feetas Pitas, Chocolate Waltz Balls, and Jig Newtons (submitted by Abby AS I was writing this).* This makes for a weird collection of snacks, but we’re definitely aiming for humor over homogeny. Please submit your ideas below. Your hilarious ideas.

*When J first came up with the idea, for a while the only things I could think of—incongruously—were Saturday Night Beaver** and The Roger Rabbit. Like we’d get some wild game and cook it up fancy for our guests at the dance party.***

**After writing this down, I see it is a much better (and probably taken) name for a skin flick.

***The Joy of Cooking has numerous recipes for both rabbit and beaver.

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