You Better Think About It, Baby: The Misfits

You may not know it yet, but you like the Misfits. No, really. You do. You may disagree--your reasons lofty and plentiful--but honestly, you're just not listening.

I know, I know--you have your doubts. That's reasonable. I used to be just like you. I remember when the familiar visage of the Crimson Ghost had about as much relevance to me as a KISS logo. When I still rolled my eyes at the Misfits patch once present at every single show I attended as a teenager. When I judged the Misfits primarily by their fan base. In short--when I had never really listened to the Misfits.

Formed in 1977 in Lodi, NJ, the Misfits began in earnest as a three piece--Glenn Danzig, Jerry Only, and a drummer known only as "Manny"--with the release of the "Cough/Cool" b/w "She" single. At the time, Danzig played an electric piano in place of guitar. It's a bizarre footnote for one of the world's best-known hardcore bands--but sort of fittingly ridiculous.

The Misfits soon became a proper hardcore band with the addition of a guitarist (and the unfortunate shit-canning of the poor piano)--and as a four piece, they recorded the Bullet ep, a loving... um... tribute to the late John F Kennedy. The band soon recorded there first full length--Static Age--but had no luck securing a label. After two more singles, the band flew out to the UK to tour with their British counterparts, the Damned. They had discussed the possibility of following up the Damned tour with an opening slot for the Clash, but after Danzig got thrown in the brig for a bar skirmish (an experience that inspired the song "London Dungeon"), their then drummer Joey Image split, and the rest of the band flew home.

After two additional 7," the band finally released their first full-length, Walk Among Us, in 1982--with a national tour following. The following year saw the release of their second and final full-length, 1983's Earth A.D.. Danzig bailed just after their final release, a 12" called Die, Die My Darling.

It's difficult to really keep track of the Misfits' recorded legacy, as at the time of their break-up the band's discography was almost entirely out of print--languishing in obscurity for years before being poorly anthologized on a number of incomplete collections--all until the mid-90s release of a career spanning, coffin-shaped box set. Still, the cult of the Misfits grew--with the band selling considerably more T-Shirts than they ever sold records, or so the story goes.

And yet, most friends of mine hate the Misfits. Or say they do. But seriously, if people would only actually listen, I swear they're not all bad.

If you like the girl groups of the 60s, you probably like the Misfits. If you like b-movies, you probably like the Misfits. If you like self-mythology, you probably like the Misfits. If you like the Ramones, you probably like the Misfits. If you like music, you probably like the Misfits. And if you like misogyny, you REALLY like the Misfits.

Which brings us to the only viable complaint that can be lobbed at the Greatest Band of All Time: dude has some serious issues with women. And it's fair not to like them for that. But why hate on the brilliance of the Misfits when you can just project all of that bane upon Danzig? I mean, "Mother"? that shit deserves the hate. Not the Misfits. I mean, they're the Greatest Band of All Time, man.