Recently in Food Dare Category

We were pleased to jump through the latest hoop toward World Wide Web domination last week when the Urban Honking intelligentsia suggested we accept a cooking challenge: Prepare a fancy pants, vegetarian feast for three L.A.-based Ur-Ho bloggaz. The catch? The meal was to cost $40 and no more.

You know that saying about not being able to take the heat, something, something… We said “Fuck yeah, we’re in!”

So last Sunday we had the distinct pleasure of hanging out with AC, Starr and Ritchey and cooking them what we considered to be a top-notch, mostly vegan meal. The only wrench in the proverbial gears was that Starr brought a friend, so our budget got a bit of an ass kicking (Full disclosure: We spent $42.50 on a four-person meal. And we think it’s only fair.) But, as it turned out, that friend was also a food freak and former cook in his own right so it was even radder. We also whipped up a last minute desert from scratch that wasn’t included—a pear and pomegranate reduction Pop-Tart.

Now, you can read the kind, kind praise over at “Regarding” from Ritchey or you can see it all unfold in the video footage. But we think the most useful part of the evening is that all four courses got a thumbs-up, so we’ve reproduced the recipes here for your home improvisation. Have at it!

Chompy is the Eating Challenger Shark Trophy. Only one man (or woman) can posses Chompy, because in addition to his name, these words are written on his side, "I am an eating champion", and there can only be one champion. Today was the first of many eating challenges, an all you can eat pizza buffet at Eatza Pizza.

With a 30 minute time limit the champion would be the one who consumed the most slices without any "reversal of fortune". A number of tactics emerged during the course of the competition, including the obvious scouring for smaller slices, and the surprising delay caused by fresh hot slices. With many different variants of mediocre (at best) pizza, including several sweet dessert styles, you would think it would keep the flavors interesting. But after about 10 slices of poorly made pizza, no novelty sauce or topping really mattered.

There seemed to be a wall at about 15 slices, which is a good five to six more slices than is really comfortable. With a total of nine people we ate 130 pieces, or just over 14 pizza pies (plus some pasta, breadsticks, and soda). With a cost of $4.50 per person we averaged about $0.31 a slice.

So, who is the champion? Here are the standings:

DISQUALIFICATION: Dave Hayden

Dave ate 10 slices, but did not consume the crusts. When asked to comment on his disqualification Dave explained he wasn't in the competition, he was just getting lunch.

9th Place: Steven Frank

With only five slices, Steven Frank ate the least pizza of anyone. He did however, take advantage of both the cheesy breadsticks (4) and the pasta with red sauce.

8th Place: C. S.

With a strange focus on the BBQ chicken pizza and dessert pizza, Cabel seemed to be playing a conceptual game. With only 7 slices he did however set a personal best.

5th Place: Daniel Peterson, Les Pozdena, and Wade Cosgrove

A three-way tie for 5th place with the unlucky 13 pieces they each ate. Wade exceeded his goal of ten, while Daniel was two away (he claims he actually ate 14) from his 15 slice goal, and unfortunately Les was a distant 7 slices from his personal goal of 15 slices.

3rd Place: Alex Pasco, Mike Merrill

With a nice round 15 pieces both Alex and Mike finished their final pieces in a race against the clock to meet their own goals.

2nd Place: J.John Afryl

J.John finished with a strong 18 pieces. After the clock hit zero, he even went and had another two slices, just to show off his eating prowess.

1st Place Eating Champion: Ian Cely

A win by a slice! 19 pieces set Ian as the Pizza Eating Champion and the current holder of Chompy the Eating Challenger Shark Trophy! Congratulations Ian, glad to see getting married has only increased your eating abilities!

Hardee's (owned by CKE Restaurants, the company that brought us Carl's Jr. and purchased Hardee's in 1997 as a way to expand their brand into the southeast) unveiled the Monster Thickburger, a burger made of two 1/3-pound slabs of Angus beef, four strips of bacon, three slices of American cheese and some mayonnaise -- all on a buttered, toasted, sesame seed bun.

This beast is a mighty 1,420-calories with 107 grams of fat. The dare is to find one and eat in one sitting (and provide video footage). Good luck digesting this! (Curt, you are at ground zero of the Hardee's infestation) We would also love some commentary about how you feel after eating this (can you actually feel your arteries clogging and heart straining to continue to pump blood throughout your body?)

More impressive than than the size is the name. "Thickburger" sounds so awful, rolling off the tongue like an insult, but with a catchiness that makes me want to repeat it over and over. CKE restaurants is also introducing a Pastrami Burger (which just feels so Jack In The Box to me) at Carl's Jr. (I'll let somone else comment on the irony of their sexual advertising)

UPDATE: Michael Jacobsen, the executive director of the Center for Science in the Public Interest has a few words about the Thickburger. (play MP3 96KB)

UPDATE: Thickburger wants to be talked about.