Bernie's Southern Bistro

The only thing more luxurious than going out to an expensive restaurant is going out to an expensive restaurant and not having to think about how much anything costs. Kevin and I had received a gift certificate for Bernie’s Southern Bistro so we had a decadent evening out.

It’s a little weird because a few years ago I would come to Chez What on Alberta and get loaded on cheap beer while yelling over the Pogues on the stereo, and then there we were on the viney patio of a somewhat upscale restaurant among throngs of northwest Portland type art patrons who’d come out to enjoy Alberta’s Last Thursday quirkiness. What a difference three years can make.

So anyway, this place has a great patio, itself the size of an entire restaurant. It has lots of nice greenery – fuschias and something that could have been wisteria, but I don’t really know what wisteria looks like so maybe not. On a balmy summer afternoon, it’s an idyllic setting for supper or cocktails.

Yeah. The cocktails. Bernie’s has got to be doing something right because they somehow managed to make bright red apple martinis seem classy, not trashy. The glasses had sugared rims and were accompanied by miniature refill carafes in tiny ice baths. I would totally come here just for drinks, especially considering the awesome-looking $3 food menu for happy hour.

Dinner was satisfying Southern fare dressed up just enough to be a little interesting but not pretentious. The fried chicken was tender and mild and came with yummy greens and gravy-rich mashed potatoes. The blackened catfish was doused in a savory, herby, salty sauce and accompanied by juicy tomatoes and okra, with a side of creamy mashed sweet potatoes with a smooth nutmeg sauce. Little buttery squares of cornbread came before the meal in the place of rolls. It would have been nice if they had come with the main dish to round out the spicy flavors, but the mashed potatoes served that purpose equally well.

The service was really good. Despite a full house we didn’t have to wait very long for anything, and the waitress remained aware and considerate of what we needed throughout the meal without being overbearing. Even though we went on Last Thursday, we were able to get a reservation by calling that afternoon, and when we changed the reservation and then arrived late, they were flexible and didn’t get mad or anything. The host told people arriving at the same time we did with no reservations that there was an hour wait, so it’s something to keep in mind.

Bernie’s is a good place to take your parents or other people worth impressing, because it’s nice without being too hip, too conservative or too fancy-pants – nobody is going to feel intimidated or alienated. Dinner for two clocked in at about $50, including entrees, one drink each and the tip. Overall, it was a very tasty evening in very pretty surroundings. Between the satisfying meal and the buzz of the booze I left feeling absolutely calm and content which, to me, is the very essence of luxury.