September 2004 Archives

Maxwell Bass Sr. [blog] has recently ditched the pacific northwest for the magical wonders of New York City. He has agreed to be on the look out for food and drinks that are new to him. This is his first post as part of the NYC branch of the New Taste Club.

Maxwell Bass Sr. tells us, "Tropical Fantasy Grape is awesome. Very grapey. I get the fantasy at a li'l cafe round the corner from my house called California Pizza."

Tropical Fantasy was brought onto the market in September 1990 by Brooklyn Bottling, a small family-owned soft drink manufacturer established in 1937, that was in 1990 only just getting by on its line of seltzers. Fantasy's comparably low price (49� per 20-ounce bottle versus Coke and Pepsi's 80� price tag for a 16-ouncer) led to a stunning initial success, and overnight a moribund firm became a bottler now with per-month sales of $2 million plus.

In April 1991 rumors began circulating in black neighborhoods that the beverage was laced with a secret ingredient that would cause sterility in black men, and that the Ku Klux Klan were the actual bottlers.

Sales of the beverage plummeted by 70%. (these rumors were of course not true)

Maxwell Bass says, "Fizzy Lizzy I get at my work. It tastes like fizzy juice."

Fizzy Lizzy consists of all-natural fruit juice and sparkling water with no added sugar, corn syrup or preservatives and an average of 70% juice per bottle. Fizzy Lizzy started because Lizzy Marlin used to always mix fruit juice and seltzer at home but could never find such a concoction in stores. She created a market for people who crave a healthful alternative to soda and a drink that�s not overly sweet.

BevNet describes the brand: Health conscious Americans can begin counting calories backwards, as Fizzy Lizzy LLC introduces a line of all-natural beverages made solely from fruit juice and seltzer that are delicious, refreshing, and not too sweet.

Maxwell Bass Sr. tells us, "The Presidente tastes like Pabst and Corona mixed. It's just as prevalent as Corona, if not more so. You see it all over NYC, advertised with neon signs and shit."

Presidente is a national favorite in the Dominican Republic brewed by Cerveceria Nacional Dominicana. Although not very well known, it's premier beer, Presidente Pilsener is popular in many Hispanic neighborhoods in the United States. There is a lot of online rumor-mongering about this being a brand in the SABMiller family, but there is nothing listed on the SABMiller corporate site about it, but it's possible the confusion comes the fact that they import the beer to the US (via a subsidiary, Martlet Importing Co.).

There should be more restaurant reviews like this one. First he gets himself thrown out of the restaurant, then he takes the leftovers to an expert to examine the quality. The results are, shall we say, not four star.

More writings; looks like fun.

In these uncertain times we live in, it's comforting to see that a struggling arms manufacturer can expand his brand into other markets.

I present to you, Vodka Kalashnikov.

Let's face it, after the Cold War the former Soviet Union lost a lot of its mystique. Now, combining two of their most culturally powerful memes, they can create a new cultural force to be reckoned with. The man in front is the Russian general, Mikhail Kalashnikov, 84, inventor of the AK-47. The man behind the scenes is John Florey, a clever Englishman who was originally hired to make the offer to Kalashnikov on behalf of another company. By the time he finally met with the man, the company wasn't interested, so Florey pushed the idea on by himself.

Oh those clever marketing types, "It looks like the legendary AK-47 Rifle,�but it holds several rounds of the finest�Original Russian vodka."

Ryan adds: i thought the red army bullet bottle was good, but this... this is perfection. i must have it.

If you are like me, there's not a thing in the world that makes you happier than a huge plate of vegan Southern food. This plate must include at least 3 of the following: Something salty, breaded and fried, something sweet and sticky, something green and leafy, something starchy, something gravy, something cornbread, something biscuit.

On Friday night, my lover working late, I set about preparing this plate of Southern Comfort. the main bulk of this meal was to come in the form of a recipe gleaned from the ever-talented Casey, with whom I lived for one glorious year directly after college.

In a jar I placed (in approximate amounts)
-2 cups of nutritional yeast
-one tablespoon each of:
-dill
-oregano
-basil
-"Spike"
-lemon pepper
-one teaspoon each of
-cayenne
-salt
-chili powder

(basically just put a little bit of all your savory spices into the yeast)

Then I cut a big hunk of firm tofu into small, fry-able pieces. I then breaded them in soymilk, flour, and the nutritional yeast concoction. I put a whole bunch of olive oil in a pan and got it real hot, then I deep-fried the hell out of that tofu. It got crispy and golden-brown and beautiful.

During this same time, I was making kale.

-put a bunch of kale in a pot
-put in half a cup of water
-put in 2 tablespoons of soy sauce
-heat on very low heat until kale is done (i.e. chewy but tender, and a lovely, vibrant green color)

I also heated up some canned baked beans, but that is not exciting.

At this point the door banged open and I walked out to say hello to Andrew, but he was not there. Filled immedidately with fear, I said, "...hello?" only to be greeted by Andrew barrelling out of the bedroom behind me in order to scare me. This is a true lowpoint in our relationship. If you know me at all, you know that that is an unacceptable thing to do. I screamed as loud as I could and tried to hit him in the face before getting ahold of myself and going to stand in the kitchen with my arms wrapped around my head, heart pounding wildly.

The beginning of our dinner was tinged with contrition on his part and a stony, punishing silence on mine.

However, the flaky, beautiful tofu soon brought us around to a state of loving friendship. Good lord, but that's a good meal!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU, SOUTHERN COMFORT FOOD!

It's true, the rumored six pounds of beef burger does exist. This honestly makes me very hungry and want to visit Clearfield, Pennsylvania.

When I was young and being raised by sugar-hating hippies (hi, mom and dad!), the only treat more treasured than sugary cereals (consumed in large quantities at slumber parties) was the occasional illicit, mysterious Hostess treat that might fall my way. I think I'm not exaggerating when I say that I can count on two hands the total number of Hostess products I've consumed in my lifetime.

Of course, even as a kid I always realized that their actual taste--bland, mealy, sugar-on-sugar--paled in comparison to the ultimate treat they were in my imagination: the Platonic ideal of Dessert foundered upon the cruel rocks of mass industrial-chemical food production.

I'm glad to see that someone's come up with a better way to use twinkies than to eat them: make art with them! Oh, sure, this twinkie sushi recipe seems to think someone might eat it, but obviously it looks better than it tastes. (More twinkie "recipes")

Then there's the fancy-pants fish-and-chips spot in NYC that's earning fame, and serious newspaper write-ups, for their deep fried twinkies.

And, if your childhood palate is ready to grow up, but you're not ready to give up the gooey treats, try serving these homemade sno-balls at your next dinner party. They look uncannily accurate, but one bite will be enough to confirm that these "rich cakes made from Dutch-processed cocoa along with a slathering of ethereal Italian meringue" are all grown up.

(p.s. Is it legal to call for alcohol in a twinkie recipe?!)