Instant Karma

So usually when I'm in a crowded public space and I have to be talking on my cell phone, I like to give back to the people around me who have to hear me talk. Par example, Saturday night I was on the L shuttle bus on the way to Alligator Lounge in B'Burg to meet some friends, and I'm on the phone with mother, because when else do I have time to catch up with my mother, and we're talking and I'm telling her what I'm up to, my thoughts and feelings on all this mind blowing stuff going on in my life, like unsafe group sex (just kidding!) and then, as the bus is getting more and more crowded, I fall into my usual routine. I start giving out useful information. Sometimes I like to rehash an interesting news article, nothing about current events because that comes out sounding editorial, but you know, some interesting scientific finding or modern romance human interest story. Or sometimes I'll share an amazing new album that everyone has to run out and byy, or movie, book, etc, etc. So this time I went with book and started telling my mom about this incredible Shirley Jackson novel I'm reading called, We Always Lived In the Castle. My mom is a writer so this info is useful to her. I'm telling her a little bit about Shirley Jackson how she, like my mother, lived in a small university town, how she was married to this intellectual from an upperclass NYC/Jewish family, how she wrote this insanely creepy short story called The Lottery (please google and read now), and on and on I'm going in a very clear, monotone voice like my name is LexisNexis. Then I get off at the Lorimer stop, I'm kinda of wandering around and this girl runs up to me. "Hey!" She says. I look at her. "Hey."
"You're going the wrong way, the Alligator Lounge is over there."
"But how did you..."
"I heard you talking on the phone."